from 2MP with love

cold war's aftereffect? numb

2009-09-19T00:50:00.006+08:00

Salam,

First and foremost, I would like to apologize for my long absence from this blog. I’ve not updated since the start of the first semester, only if you realize of course. Things has been really busy for me (and for you guys too I believe)and for me, rather than spending my free time updating my blog, I'd rather fill it with activities that allow me to mature, socialize and experience lots of thing physically with my friends. As some of you know or maybe you don't, xkuaseknah is dead. Literally for the blog and technically for its people.
I never thought that I will post this, but things need to be said and undone things need to be done.

and I am trying very hard thinking on how to say things subtly, as using a very intimidate kind of approaching towards reader and curses are not my style, yet at the same time project what I have been wanting to say.

Everybody change. As simple as that. But there are some who didn't. These two sentences contrast which each other I know. But that is the reality. Everything is not objective especially when we are dealing with human. A good friend that you created bond with might not stay with you all along the way. Like me. I am no longer as close to you, Hanis, Huda, Fae and Mimi, even though we rocked classes together.
I know and you girls knew it too that we are falling apart. Why? Well, the answer lies on the moment that we treat and think and see small things that used to be normal, and okay turned to be the greatest annoyance of all. A joke that created explosive laughter between us suddenly no longer funny. It unexpectedly becomes the seed of hateful.

Sticking close to each other is good. But it is a disaster when a person or more gives black energy to the rest. And it is also a bad culture when we still stuck up with the same thing all over again, for the past 2 years. The same old jokes, the same old problems and the same old thinking and the same old friends.

We all know about the "silent war" or "cold war" or whatever between you peeps. You guys have met up, talked about it, told your true feelings and cried. But seriously, no matter how much you pees being honest on that night, no matter how many liter of tears you let go, the pain still remain in your heart. Things will never be the same again. I am not being pessimistic here but being realistic.

Girls, things will never be the same again. it is too strange to act nothing happen. Because the passion went numb.

Once you were betrayed or treated bad, trust collapsed. And to build it back like the way it was before is complete impossible.

I chose to change mahallah. Honestly writing, I ran and you guys knew it too. I ran away from the person that I sometimes feel close with and sometimes hate. And definitely uncomfortable in most of the time. I ran away from our routine. I ran away from problems that I foresee. And I ran away because I want too. I need a change. Mentally and environmentally. I made the first step, and I never looked back. I am proud for what I chose and I am grateful. It was and still a wise decision. I am happy and I am no longer as moody and hot-tempered as I used to be. I am still as sensitive as before, but my sensitivity now I believe is well control. and importantly I stop straining my brain on questions like" what did I do wrong?” this question that i had, that i created, now i have the answer. And of course I came up with it. The answer is very simple. I didn't do anything wrong.

Is that true? Well, it is true for me. My ground is that I believe in myself. I seriously know me wont and never being able to treat people badly, intentionally. As all my bad that ye may see in me are complete ignorance and definitely unintentionally.

If you find my answer and reasoning is wrong, just leave it because I am a “bird” and i am busy flying and singing and I just don’t care.

Holliday

2009-07-19T13:52:00.001+08:00

Adventurous journey and camping at Gua Tempurung or fun moments with full facilities at Genting Highland?

just "O"

2009-07-19T10:42:00.002+08:00

Out of stock! O my bag.

The washing machine and the dryer were broke. O my laundry!

I can't take Hangul class. O my hectic schedule!

I have to submit reports and do homework for ALC every week! O my God!

I lose my appetite. O? hohohoho....

Please help me!

2009-07-01T23:48:00.009+08:00

I am a girl who is not easily fall in love at first sight.
but I do now...and I don't know which one to choose!

(1) When I first found this bag, me and my sis quickly said, "Aku suka beg ni!" x ordr lagi tapi dah berebut macam apa ntah. I love it. Price RM38

(2) I love this one too! especially the colour and look at that little pocket. attractive. The price is RM 44!

(3) I first saw this bag on Wanie's shoulder. I fell in love with it and I can't stop myself from admiring it eversince. Again, I love the colour and its design. siap tanya beli kat mana lagi tau~ and the price is shocking RM38!.

(4) This bag is the biggest of 'em all and has the most simple design.I can stuff all my things in one go and it can cover up my extra fat. Price RM 42.

Some of you might know that I don't really have this feminine kind of bag because I don’t think it suits me. And I know I was wrong. Seriously, how can a bag doesn't suit someone. Unless a guy wearing girls bag, with all-those-furs and mirror, then yeah. It is easier to buy 'em all, only if I have lots of saving.

what is Friendship?

2009-06-30T23:47:00.005+08:00

A Friend ....

Accepts you as you are
Believes in you
Calls you just to say ~Hi~
Doesn't give up on you
Envisions the whole of you
Forgives your mistakes
Gives unconditionally
Helps you
Invites you over
Just because
Keeps you close at heart
Loves you for who you are
Makes a difference in your life
Never judges
0ffers support
Picks you up
Quiets your fears
Raises your spirits
Says nice things about you
Tells you the truth when you need to hear it
Understands you
Values you
Walks beside you
Xxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Yells when you won't listen and
Zaps you back to reality

anonymous

I deadly want a friend like this, but the main question is am I one like that?
I seriously need to change myself, my character actually, as a friend of my peeps.
I know sometimes I made them angry, mad and annoyed with my attitude. I didn't mean it though sometimes I wished I do. Sometimes, I talked behind their back, because I know they talked behind me too. I feel good when I do that because now they feel the way that I do, but I also know and I too feel the way that they feel, after the sweet little revenge; I feel bitter and not better.

I want to be better because my dear friends deserve it, as well as myself.
I want to start remember their full name as well as their birthday which I am not good at. I want to know even little, what they love and what they hate.
I want to appreciate them, for their existence in my life, as they give me happiness. Though some gives me sadness, they actually gave me lessons too.

I also want to try my best to find my old acquaintances back on my school era. It is a pity and a waste to have a lot of friends but do not keep in contact with them.

I hope that my friends too, has the same understanding with me, and together we fulfill all A to Z of FRIENDSHIP.

i am happy

2009-06-29T16:47:00.003+08:00

chongmal haengbok...I finished my final exam on 24th June but only got home yesterday on 28. I packed my things and my computers with the help from my roommates and Fadz. I am really grateful they were there to help me.

Now, the reason why I am so happy is that I am finally inside my home. It has been a while since my last visit and I miss my mom terribly. I bought her Big Apple and my Dad just love it. I think I will buy Big Apple every time I come back home. (If I have some money left)

For three days, Nisa, a boy (which I should not tell whom) and me stayed in Yaya's home. We had BBQ party and Hanis was there too! We had beautiful memories and pictures. Fadz and Aimi were supposed to join us but they both have their own agenda with their families. Yaya picked us up at UIA and we went straight to Putrajaya's pasar malam. We met her abah there and bought some food. We didn't do much activity on the first stay there. We just went out ambil angin malam and ate ice-creams and taking pictures. That very night, I, Nisa and Yaya were supposed to berjoyah, and while we do that, I fall asleep. hahaha...They talked till 2 in the morning and as I was sleeping at the middle, they woke me up and shoo me to change place with Nisa. And I was the last person to wake up. The next day, we went to Alamanda with Afiq, Yaya's cute and manja little brother. we watched movie together. Me and Nisa chose 'Drag me to hell' and Yaya with her two brothers watched 'Transformers'. 'Drag me to hell' leave me with anger. gila geram ngan nenek tua tu. jahat gila. There are lots of disgusting events and shocking too! But the ending is really sad. And before the film started, there were a couple doing their own movie. After the movie end, I bought a pair of jeans. I don't have enough money to splurge but it was an exceptional case. I wet my jeans that I was wearing! No! Not with urine but water. Thanks to bidet on Alamanda's rest room. Seriously, why can't they use normal hose? It is not easy to squat wearing jeans and adjusting you butt at the same time to clean stuff. I tried my best to cover my butt with my bag and Nisa' body. That night, on the second day of our stay, we had BBQ. Me ate Nasi Daging 2 times with 1 chicken wing and hotdog. That was the first round menu. I ate for the second round with hanis. When I thought I was full, Yaya's cousin brought cupcakes! And I ate sausages and chicken again.
On the third day, we went to Hanis place and ate Soto. Hanis bangun seawal pagi untuk menguruskan kentang. Btw hanis, kentang ko mmg sedap! Soto joint venture Kak Tuti and Hanis' Mother is soooo delicious. I don't remember berapa kali tambah. I ate some, answered nature calls and ate again. Boleh bukak kedai Soto la. Besides eating, we also berjoyah. But our joyah was cut short as we have to go to Taman Wetland to fetch Yaya's brother. And went to Alamanda again! I bought Big Apple for my family and we ate at Secret Recipe.

For two days straight we went out at night jalan2 and taking pictures and eating ice-creams. We went to Masjid, jambatan and all. Sounds like it was my first time there but actually I have been to Putrajaya a couple of times spending my days at Hanis place. We had girl’s night out, the plan of meeting DBSK at the airport and stuff. What a memory.

I didn't tell Yaya but this party for my opinion brings me closer to her. We were close during matriculation days together with Nisa. We went to class together, had our meals together and talked, smiled, laughed non-stop but time went by. We were apart for awhile. we had our own friends and our own way. I am happy that we are together in this, like we used to be on Matriculation days. And I hope that since Hanis and Yaya already knew each other's house, and they are both my good friends, please don't berjoyah about me ye...hahahah....

Tag!

2009-06-12T11:21:00.002+08:00

1) Bekas kekasih saya adalah
* Minho..tapi saya akan sentiasa memerhati dan menjaga dia dari jauh...

2) Saya sedang mendengar
* suara anak menakan saya...

3) Mungkin saya patut
* buat report saya cepat2 dari buat tag ni...hehehe...kena submit today tapi xde mood nak wat la.

4) Saya suka
* kaum Adam yang berbangsa Korea dan menyanyi dlm group (n_n) , jalan2 dan makan.

5) Sahabat-sahabat saya
* ada banyak. dari Subang,Ipoh,Jitra,Sg. Petani dan UIA, tapi hampir 92% lost contact. hahahaha...macam mana ni~

6) Saya tak faham
* kenapa orang selalu kata saya sombong. saya sbenarnya seorang yang peramah, kelakar dan baik hati.

7) Saya kehilangan
* telefon kesayangan saya. huhu~sedihnya...

8) Ramai yang berkata
* saya ni sombong. Saya sebenarnya seorang yang peramah, lawak, manis dan baik.

9) Cinta itu adalah
* permulaan bagi kejujuran dan kadang kala pembohongan dimana toleransi dan komunikasi adalah penting. definisi saya terlalu teknikal kerana saya tidak dilamun cinta lagi. harap sila memahami.hehe~

10) Disuatu tempat, seorang sedang...
* menunggu saya submit report.

11) Saya akan cuba
* kurangkan berat badan dengan bersenam dan berenang...Hanis~jgn lupa ajar aku brenang ye!

12) Ayat selamanya membawa maksud...
* apa ni...saya x paham.

13) Telefon bimbit saya
* adalah W80i berwarna putih kepunyaan abang saya.

14) Bila saya terjaga
* terus saya ikat rambut dan kemas katil.

15) Saya paling meluat
* orang yang tak menepati masa.
* tengah saya semangat nak berchit-chat atau download videos yang lagi 10 saat nak siap, internet ada probs. hei, geram betul!
* tumbuh jerawat baru. sama macam mama n Hanis! besala, hawa.
* orang yang mengutuk saya bila ada kawan. bila kawan dia xde, terkedek2 datang cari saya.

16) Haiwan paling comel yang pernah saya temui
* anak kucing! dulu, saya ada kucing jantan nama Mei. selepas itu, ada anak kucing datang rumah saya. saya bagi nama dia Mei Mei. tapi, Mei rogol Mei Mei, Mei Mei pun mengandung. anak2 Mei Mei seekor je hidup. Saya pun jaga. Dia hidup sehari je, tapi saya sempat bagi nama, iaitu Anak Mei Mei. Mei dan Mei Mei saya tinggalkan di Sg. Petani sebab depa xnak naik keta ikut pindah. sedihnya~

17) Malam ini saya akan
* download videos dan musik dan ym.

18) Ketika anda melihat cermin pada hari ini
* kulit dah makin kusam. xpakai produk katakan.

19) Saya betul-betul inginkan
* Jung Yunho. lelaki idamanku. saya boleh bayangkan betapa bagusnya dia sebagai seorang bapa...

20) Siapa yang anda ingin tag
* sesiapa pun xpe.

For those who have a blog or two and have time to read

2009-06-12T10:47:00.000+08:00

There is that high school stuff, MySpace to Friendster then Blog and Facebook. Actually, I don’t know the chronology. I used to have an account for MySpace and Friendster. If you typed my name, you will see a nearly 2 years of unlogged in account of MySpace and a Friendster under my real name but Nanny Fran’s picture with less than 2 friends. I put Nanny Fran’s picture because I love that show especially that funny and full of sarcastic butler. Hehehe… I forgot his name actually and both e-mail together with passwords to log in. Alhamdulillah, I remember my now e-mail which is the fourth account I have created so far though sometimes I confused my YouTube and blog password.

Here in this blog I choose to touch on various topics that interest me cause if not, why should I write and even post it, rite? I wrote about Kpop world, general stuff and me with friends stuff. I choose to write it in a positive way, as best as I could, and I hope best to those who read, with exceptional for Minho’s new nose. This is because, a blog which has its own class, a freedom of opinion with no limitation and bare-naked to public’s eyes and face is a no-no for 4D, ‘Drop Dead Dumb and Disgusting’ post that can call for death. Brutal huh.

A blog though we may call it MY BLOG, is sadly not ours only. Our family, friends, race, country and religion has their own shares. Our blog can tell a story, which we ourselves write. It is just like a novel or a short story. A story though it does not tell the real life events of the writer, in most cases, it reflects what the author believes in and eventually people will link it with their parents, environment, and most extreme, religion. Just like what we had learnt in Novel and Short Story class. It may reflect the author’s behavior, feelings and mind through the way it is presented and the choice of words. If we keep on blogging about our hatred, our prejudice and stuff like that, are we leaving readers with a good impression? Definitely not, unless we serve our friends and anonymous readers from around the globe with intelligent, wise and just good posts.

But that doesn’t mean that we HAVE to blog on knowledgeable, good from its seed till its fruit and stuff like that, just control. A continuous good stuff is awesome, continuous happy events and a little sad news is good, continuous good mix bored stuff is fine but a continuous bad stuff is a disaster. A web disaster. Yes, it is as simple as that. Sometimes, we just have to, we need to, pour our anger or disgust as we are at the peak of patience, we are on the verge of screaming till our throat hoarse in public place, or our mind is at the second of explosion but seriously, control.

If we can control our anger starting after the event that made us pissed off and go back home and membebel kat mak ada orang cari pasal, sleep and eat or pray to God asking some patience and made our Iman stronger, then you remember you have a place to pour out all your anger, so you rock the laptop or computer, connecting the internet, log in to Blog.com, write an emotional essay, and delete, and write again, put “you scumbag of the earth”, or more samseng and ganas b*** dan seangkatan dengannya, and delete it again, thinking it is too harsh, thus replace with another ‘b’ word in English or “go to hell”, as English is subtle than Malay, followed with ABC Spelling & Grammar and click send; we definitely have time to think about our action and its consequences. Importantly, if the topic deals with other people’s life. All of us know that a post in a blog can show us the way to court and even jail and might be in worst case scenario, ISA. I read from a newspaper about a blogger charged with fitnah and was brought to court. A blog can be a platform of truth and reality but it also can be a plantation of lies and fitnah. And if some readers accept lies as truth, and spread to others, a life is affected, justice is disturbed thus trust collapsed.

For me, rather than updating my own blog, I enjoy reading others, I have the thought of deleting my account twice btw. Updating blog is like homework for me. I don’t really enjoy homework though it is for my own benefit. I love reading people’s little world as I love to read on things that I never come cross with. I read from friends to a complete stranger to an extreme anonymous till an extreme famous-glamour-happening-gossip-ME blogs. It is also because of my belief that everyone and each of us has some knowledge or experiences or opinions that are beneficial, which others don’t have or yet to have. Thus, it is a pleasurable thing if we can share it.

Perfect grammar and beautifully written sentences in an interesting topic will leave me with a smile, good impression and envy too that made me say “What a good English/ Malay and what a wise and good perspective such and such can see”. A just shocking, disturbing and 99% annoying blog made me put a face that calls for slaps from family till friends, twice on each cheek. It is not just a matter of portraying our real self, or being honest, it is a matter of ethics in World Wide Web, morals and our own name. Do not take anonymity or freedom of writing as a base for us to touch or stand, for writing trash, rather choose to respect others and give yourself and those that might intentionally or unintentionally affected some respect too. It is not that we will win anything by talking back monitor to monitor towards someone or express hatred and objection. I talk based on experience and observation.

I put my blog under fine category, a continuous good mix bored stuff. In my opinion, a line between good and bored depends on the interest of the readers and writers, but a line between good and bad depends on our belief and moral.

P/s: Respect, relax and response.

On outings and Mr. Ramen

2009-06-11T10:50:00.001+08:00

Short semester is very short, ironically there is still a plenty of time to kill. I nearly got sick with boredom. Fortunately I have cool roommates and friends to spent time with.

So far, I’ve went to Genting Highland with cutey honey, Nisa and joined Nani and her clan there. That is my first time going to a fun fair and I hope to go there again with xkuaseknah and family of course.

I’ve been to Taman Metropolitan with all my roommates but sadly on a bad time and a bad day. Insyaallah, I will go there again with proper planning. It is a beautiful place to hang out and play and have picnic.

The third outing which is an unforgettable one is me and Hanis plan of eating Korean food. Hanis and I went to KLCC with just this one mission. But the restaurant was closed! Xlaku kot. I ended up with Yoshinoya and Hanis with Western food.

Last but not least, me and Nisa, again, had some fun time together at Berjaya Times Square. We did a little shopping and lots of window shopping, cuci mata which is a must and have second round lunch or preferably call it as an early dinner; at 3.30 pm. Hahaha…panggil makan petang la…tapi yang berat punya.

We ate at Mr. Ramen and were shocked! Deadly delicious food with rich, creamy and fresh fruit juices! Nisa ordered Japanese Loh Udon which is a risk as we don’t know what the hell Loh means. I ordered a safer choice out of variety of food that is Spicy Tom Yam Seafood Ramen. Very safe choice kan? Ahahhaha…

Nisa’s food came out to be a creamy and thick Mushroom soup with lots of seafood and chicken. The amalgamation of Udon and mushroom soup is perfectly delicious. Udon absorbed the soup’s taste and still leave its original flour taste. An alien to our Malay tongue but we can adapted to it as quickly as 2 spoons. Mana x nyer, sedap yang amat kot. Mine is The Rock. Walaupun Tom Yam datang dari Thailand, orang Nepal pun pandai buat oo though tak sespicy yang I want. depa x kedekut bahan, mangkuk pun besar. Mmg kenyang la. X macam café kat sini. And the price is affordable. I have put aside some money to go there again, this time with Hanis and Huda, after I finish with final exam. I can’t wait. I want to try combo set which is Chicken Katsu Don that comes together with California Roll, Mango Pudding and Japanese Green Tea. Aahhh…sukanya!

Lots of money spent outside means little money to spend inside. Nestum and Quaker oat becomes my staple food now.

Btw, Maryam’s café has improved a lot. There is a lot of variety of food to choose, with clean and welcoming environment. The price is also cheap! Lepas ni agaknya makin berisi la budak Maryam. I love going to Maryam now. Just to inform you girls that Maryam Café won first place during Quality week. Second place is Evoke café. Evoke suddenly murah harini. Mungkin sebab dah tukar cashier kot…Alhamdulillah.

A lesson to remember

2009-06-11T10:44:00.001+08:00

In my previous post, I said I wonder what will lose next, and the answer is my wallet.

Me seriously, lost my wallet just this late morning while chit chatting via World Wide Web with Hanis Sulaiman. Me in ITD and she was in her cozy home. I was surrounded with a lot of girls and ironically, broken computers. Based on my poor calculation and memory, I tried four times to log in using four different computers and the smart computers said that I do not put the correct password. At that moment, I really want to have a seat with good and functioning computer to know what the earth is going on with Kpop world!

I am forgetful and I was clumsy.

I jumped from one seat to another and accidently left my wallet on one of the tables. Me deadly think and even now still believe I put my wallet back in my bag! But the evidence and witness says the opposite. After my alarmed clock rang, I quickly wrote daa to Hanis and log off. I did not even once glance back. Well, this is understandable because it is not like I’m leaving my boyfriend on a jet plane. I was only alarmed on this unfortunate event a couple of minutes later while wanting to buy delicious, red and icy cold watermelon juice before run to my Arabic Class. Alhamdulillah I did not ordered it yet, if not, malu besar mak nyah…

I was shocked and after I knew what was missing from my life, I quickly walkathon from HS Café to ITD and found nothing. Not even a clue.

I was wrong.

I ask people there, I loafing around with mega movement as I always do, panicking, and hoping my wallet will come back to me. I nearly broke down. This has been two times I lost my wallet containing all my important cards. My Identity card, two Bank cards, Matric card, The Body shop Card and Dental Card. Excluding my cards, in total; I’ve lost my wallet four times. I even asked for help from my Research Methodology lecturer. Kebetulan jer jumpa. I went to Pak Guard Station and filled forms. The officer there was a very friendly man and showed his sympathized and gave advice. Rhyme. He told me to go back to where I believed my wallet has gone and also checked all female toilets around there. In some cases, wallets are found in toilet with of course no cash, just trash. Rhyme. I followed his advice as Malay says; dengar cakap orang tua. I went to the crime scene again and found a piece of evidence. A note pasted on the door.

Salam,
ATTENTION TO (my full name)
I FOUND YOUR PURSE ON MONDAY AT 10:25AM. COME & CLAIM IT FROM ME, YANA. I’M WAITING YOUR CALL.

I went there thrice, and didn’t see it… the fourth one, Allah opens my eyes and my mouth utters Alhamdulillah and I remember Him more than usual days.

I am always nasii.

I am happy. And I am sad too.

I remembered my days when I lost a hundred plus ringgit, and my Fellow said something that I disagree, then and believe now. My money which was frequently lost might be because I don’t do amal jariah and sadaqah. Sometimes, Allah took back something from us, because it is not ours from the beginning, and also to remind us as we are originally forgetful, that sadaqah is very important. It helps us as well as it helps our Muslim and non-Muslim friends. The same goes to Zakah. A portion from our a’mal mufrad mal is not ours. It is other Muslims portion.
Abah,Mak,Hanis and Yana, the girl that found my wallet, all said, “ pasni hati2” or “ jangan cuai dah”. And I happily accept their advice.

What a lesson to learn, to remember and to be grateful.
So, my answer for previous post is, I am forgetful and careless.

p/s: you girls can contact me using my old number now. (n_n) I am Happy!

Attention girls

2009-05-30T20:51:00.004+08:00

Do not contact my mobile phone for now.
Even if you do, no one will entertain your call and message.
My mobile phone was stolen this afternoon, in my own house.
I am all heart-broken and speechless, so I'll watch more videos.
Just like TaeYeon said, people are scarier than ghost.

edit: i just realized that i lost so many things. My money during Matriculation days(RM150-200), my Identity card(twice), my purse(i was pick-pocketed at KL Central), my bank cards and now my mobile phone.

i wonder about three things right at this moment.
Am I...
1) too careless?
2) or just have bad lucks?
3) or have the tendency to meet wrong people at the wrong time?

importantly, I wonder whats next.

Nothing in particular

2009-05-02T12:46:00.010+08:00

Oh God, tomorrow I’ll be back in UIA and this is so depressing. I love the environment there but one thing that is lack off: my mother! aigoo~ my blood pressure.

As I’ve motioned on my previous post, I’m taking Arabic 4 and Research Method class. I have classes straight from Monday til Thursday and all free on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. So girls, if you want to kill your time (or help killing mine!) just stop by my room. Or let's just meet at somewhere and have fun eating and spazzing. Seriously, we have never been away more than 3 months apart and with our non-stop talking that we proud off being no use at home, we won’t be human anymore.

My lil sis and mi patar are not at home right now. She is in a competition at Kuantan representing her school. I can’t remember what competition but something to do with The Star Newspaper. Seriously, I don’t think she'll win. Hahaha...Unnie nappa~

Btw girls, have you listen to 2PM’s Hate You song? Please listen to it. I listened to it once and like fergh I fall in love. They are talented though some of the members do not have the V.O.S. but they rock their game. Each performance was like bomb especially Again and Again. I love their Intro performance and their music. I hope they will come to Malaysia! Fan meeting? Concert? I’ll rock both!

And here my girls~SNSD. I watch their performance on Chocolate and guess what? Their voice and stage attitude have improve. One of my favorite is Come on Over. They don’t have any konglish accent there and Maknae shocked me. watch it for yourself.
These girls have the body, the look, the voice and the boys. I love them especially my lovely Taeyeon and cute Maknae. Sooyoung will be an MC, Tiffany has her solo activities, YoonA busy with promoting her drama and everybody can’t stop loving them! Even ex-anti said that SNSD grow on them. Hehe~ my girls Jjang!!!

GEE won 9 times on MusicBank, a new record and that is The Power of 9.

a girl commits suicide...

2009-05-02T02:06:00.008+08:00

That sight, it nearly popped my eyes out of its sockets. I automatically stopped breathing but just stared.

2 Days before the incident.

I woke up with my heart races with my breathing. I dream about a student commit suicide by hanging herself on the shower. It was at night, I woke up from my sleep to take a bath. While heading to the toilet, I see it with my own eye that a body was hanging directly in front of me. But I just couldn't stop walking. I even go inside the same shower! Suddenly, I said in my mind that this is not right, so I walk out of the shower and go to the last bathroom. There is very little light on that very place, so I change my mind again, and just walk out of the toilet, with my mind starts to realize what I am into. I went back to my dorm and I inform my roommates about it, we called the police and they say that they will come the next morning. And Karam Singh Walia is the Chief policeman. The end of the dream.

2 Days later.
At night, I love to open my window so tat fresh night air will cool my room temperature due to the heat from the lamp and the computer. I was watching my old videos compilation. I was all happy. I was laughing and giggling. My roommate then asks me something from her room, so, I paused the video. After finish answering her question, I wanted to resume watching the video back. But my itch full eyes wanted to enjoy the night scenery. The pitch black sky with little stars calmed me until I suddenly looked at the room of opposite block and...

A girl commits suicide!!!
that sight, it nearly popped my eyes out of its sockets. I automatically stopped breathing but just stared.
Oh my God! A girl commits suicide! I thought at first.
I quickly closed the window. I kept silent for a couple of second. My heart almost kills me. Then my roommate came to my room. I asked her if she wants to look at something, she replied "what?” i opened the window and told her where to look at and she calmly said,
"itu baju!".

A girl commits suicide! I thought at first. Damn

Fin.

(p/s): I took a couple of pictures and tried to zoom as much as my phone can. This is From 2MP WITH fEAR.

Again and again...mama tagged me vol. 2

2009-05-02T00:48:00.003+08:00

Rules & Regulations
* Do not copy answers.
* Tag questions must be 100% same.
* Tag people before doing the tag
# I add a new rule,I don't follow the above rules.

People I Know

1. Fauzana
2. Nadiah
3. Nazurah
4. Triningsih
5. Amirah
6. Sira
7. Nana
8. Diyana
9. Hajar

-How do you know 1?
* we were in the same class during matriculation days. i still can't remember how we got close. we were both tagged by Fadz as Budak Sombong Generasi Pertama btw.

-What would you do if you never meet 2?

* I have one less friend then.

-What would you do if 3 & 4 dated?
* They both are not queer and not compatible even if one of them is a boy.

-Would 5 & 6 make a good couple?
* 100% negative and we all know why.

-Do you think 7 is attractive?
* definitely. she is talented, bubbly and smart.

-Would you date 8?
* we are not queer.

-Tell me something about 9.
* she is a Benl student like us. we knew each other since matriculation days but become closer now since me and her both are in Caklempong Club. I even borrowed her Baju Kurung for PGG's Dinner.hehe~

-What’s 1’s favourite past time?
* memuji fizikal, perangai dan suara Jaejoong.

-What language does 2 speaks?
* malay, kadang2 Urdu.

-Who is 3 going out with?
* her 2 years younger boyfriend. menyampah! haha..guro jer mama.

-How old is 4?
* 20. a year younger than me.

-When was the last time you talked to 5?
* I can't remember. all i know is last semester.

-Who is 6’s favorite singer?
* Taufik Batisyah. ini soalan budak tadika.hahahah...

-Would you date 7?
* we are not queer. somehow, this has become my line in this post eh~

-Is 8 single?
* i dont think so, hehe~ even if she is, there are at least 2 people waiting for her.

-What’s 9’s last name?
* alamak! sorry hajar,idk. but she call herself Ruby and i know why.

Mama tagged me

2009-05-02T00:12:00.004+08:00

List these rules on your blog.

* Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog.
* Tell 7 unspectacular quirks of yours.
* Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
* Link the person who tagged you.
* Leave a comment for each blogger.

7 facts bout me??
1. I am a Coffee and Teh Tarik maniac.
2. I am not into Hollywood, Bollywood and Malaywood.
3. I was a hot tempered person. Even my high school teachers knew about it.
4. I can't swim.
5. I was HOT during my secondary school, Cold during matriculation period and now, suam-suam.
6. I do not watch Star Wars, The Lord of The Ring, Twilight, Sex and The City, Gossip Girls etc. Rather, I watch all 3 CSIs, Without a Trace, NCIS, 555,553,551,303,701,702.
7. I have never been to an island, beaches and fun-fair. But I had gone to Gunung Jerai 3 times I guess I have been inside Gua Kelam and Gua Tengkorak (highly recommended!) and used to watch a circus alone and at night when I was 13.

7 unspectacular quirks of mine??

I. I forget information quicker than register information.
2. Suddenly, I wanted to become a Barista.
3. I always day-dreaming. Biasala, org kreatif.
4. I am very punctual and hope that people respect it. So, next time people, be on time if you are dealing with me.
5. I was tagged as Budak Sombong Generasi Pertama and Anak Orang Kaya Yang Sombong based on what others say of my first impression.
6. I am a good student
7. I am a good girl.

The person who had tagged me: Mama manja~

The fifth rules: Mama dah tagg depa dah.

I’m done with hibernating. So, prepare yourself for a long post

2009-05-01T22:52:00.005+08:00

assalamualaikum...

Wow...it’s hard for me to believe that I'm blogging again. Why?
Because I just don’t have time and I nearly wanted to just get rid of my place in this blog kingdom!

Previous semester is the most hectic and crazy period I've ever had and I know all of you UIA soldiers agree with me. Plus, with all my self-realization and self-exploration, it sometimes and somehow hardens my day. Changes are never easy but I can say without no doubt, it is possible. I’m not saying that I've changed to a better person or friends student daughter whatsoever, but I can sensed now something in me and of course in my life that I have had neglected and worst, I didn’t even realize it! You know what? lets just move on to a new topic or something that is more clearer and more defined and that is ill be in our precious and beautiful garden of knowledge this Sunday! Yup, I’m all in short semester, pretty!

I’m having Arabic level 4 and research method this short semester and I just want to share with you that I got an A- for my Arabic level 3!!!Hahahaha...I know, I know...thank you! Hahaha...girls, seriously it is not that hard! And I’m not kidding you nor bragging. All you need to do is give (full) concentration in class and of course do whatever homework that Ustazah or Ustaz slam you with. And a lil bit of memorization. After that, this precious beautiful A shape will be on your result slip. If you have interest in it, that is even better! It is like you are in love with chocolate ganache cheese cake and you wanted to learn how to make it from an expert!

Now, it is not fair to only stresses on your strength and talk and on and on about it without a bit of your weaknesses. Because, that is life! Not everything is beautiful. Though, I get a good result for my Arabic, my pointer or CGPA is still the same. 3.2. That’s it. The same number since I was in matriculation! it is good that it does not get any lower but it is definitely 100& better if I can improve my pointer even a bit right? Rather than a flat, static CGPA. Still, I do not want to plant a new same seed of hope that I used to plant on my previous semester, rather, I want to give more time on it, more concentration so that it will start growing.

As far as I know, out of all xkuasenah citizens, only I am going to register for semester 3! wah wah wah~ lepas gian ke kak? Whatever it is, hope you enjoy your long holiday with something meaningful rather than making yourself fat and in worse case scenario, become a cult member of cyberspace. We’ve saw not once but two tragic life being taken away due to pass-visa-date on the other world, that is, cyber world. Look, listen and learn babe.

Now, welcome to my fifth paragraph. I’m in love with 2PM and so do others (mama,huda,hanis,fadz) and all I want to say is Junho is mine! Oh God, what I just typed is sooo childish I know but I just can’t help it. If not, someone will say, " eh Rina/Nyah, aku cop dia dulu eh, dia aku punya. aku minat dia dulu dari engkau." or sort of. So far, only me liking him and ironically, I wish other people like him as much as I do. That is what artist is for. To be like by all people. Whatever it is, I know that everybody is in love with 2PM and that is more than enough.

And something that I’ve been waiting to write about, and actually the biggest reason I start bloging back. I hope it is not true though it can be seen with naked eyes but...
WTH WITH PEOPLE NOWADAYS!!! aarrghhh chincha, do you really need a plastic surgery to change something that is just damn fine???!!!! Minho ya, noona ga chongmal minho chowayo, kundae, wAEgurae NO, do a surgery on your perfect nose? If you voluntarily, or force by SM or you parents told you to do one, you should have done it on your left eye! Do you get me?? LEFT EYE! Make it even!!!! ya pabo yah~
I know, we can’t turn back time, but sometimes, anger need to be released. Though it has nothing to do with me or it does not change my feelings for him, seriously, he is too young and too beautiful to have a plastic surgery.
aigooo~ minho ya, naemameul appayo...ommo!aigooo~

(HANIS, AK TENGAH TULIS BLOG AK LA NEH)

Ok... I’m done I guess...my revelation from God was interrupted with ammunishd saying
: hoi makcik!
: update la blog ko tuh!
: bersarang dh aku tengok

keh pun reply
: tengah tulis
: panjang nih
: sabo la nek
: anyak benda nak cakap nih
: hahahaha

oh one more thing
so long, Grissom.

oh sedihnya hatiku...
Minho ngan Grissom ni sama jer! melukai hatiku~ aigooo~ my blood pressure.

2MP's taste

2009-03-04T21:50:00.003+08:00

what can we do with a 2MP mobile phone?
take pictures of course. what else.
and that is what i do.

my header is the pic i took a couple months ago. location, in my room of course. and yes, that is the place where i sit down studying, eating, watching vids, day dreaming, and sometimes sleep(skodeng too). this pic definitely or may be put under beginners section but who cares. i love what i see and saw. sometimes.

and why do i change my header?
Because Nana changed hers. and I'm sooo jealous. ilmu adobe amat sukar utk dimaster!
and watching the same light is boring too.
heheheh...

till my next post, update yours.

smile people, smile.
laugh together, laugh.

Pantomime

2009-02-19T23:56:00.003+08:00

my sister who is an ex-Benl student currently pursuing her B.A in UM under Education. after leaving all those hectic lifestyle that we are now face, she got really stressed and engrossed in finishing her assignment. I'm not sure what course she is in, i guess pre-school development? argh, who cares. the reason why I'm writing a post about her is that, she have to do a group work on an activity for the kids in pre-school and her group chose to do pantomime. shadow pantomime to be exact. she have a role to play,aborigine woman. nice. muahahaha...well basically, she showed me a vid of shadow pantomime and i immediately fall in love with it. it is sooooooooo cute. and funny and something new for me as i have stick my eyes only to Korean stuff lately. shadow pantomime needs definitely a lot of hard work, accuracy and creativity though the length of performing it is only a couple of minutes. here is the vid that my sister showed me and seriously, i just love them! especially the duck part. reminds me of Junsu and also the man running after the bus! aigoo...what an art. this vid really makes my day.

Mak Jah! nak soto satu!

2009-02-18T15:40:00.002+08:00

kenapa atip tulis pasal soto mak jah di blognya?
because they worth it.
ferh...sampai camtu skali.

before that, my Islamic Ethics class is cancalled and i took this oppurtunity to blog after such a long time of dissapearance; rather than continue my sleep which has been fatally abuse lately. thanks to three midterms in a week plus a presentation and hafazan.
just to inform, i have another 4 paper works to do which i dont even start yet and 3 presentations to come. tapi basically everyone ada timbunan kerja kan. btw, first time nih blogging from ITD UIA. hahaha...bangga tau.

back to our theatre "Alahai..Mak Jah" performed by Nusantara Club.
its worth it. and i said it twice. you guys recieved my big round of applause that night.
Mak Jah made me have a very good time there together with my dear friends mimi, istiqamah, trining and etc. (Dian, jgn sedih ye ko dlm etc..ak nak cepat.tapi xpe, ak rasa ko x tau kewujudan blog ku). all the actors and actresses act their character very well. they have a very good voice projection, smooth plot and we can see their hardwork on making the play a success (de scandale? oh assignment! kepada yang tidak memahami, teruskan jer membaca. jgn dilayan sngt drama budak ni). the only problem that i noticed and i believed all the audience can detect (unless you have very serious hearing problem) is the sound system. kenapa lah dipasang lagu pada masa yang tidak sesuai dan terpasang (kot) and tiada kepelbagaian dalam memilih lagu. tapi kalau disengajakan takpela tapi kalau tak it is understandable, as

to err is human..
to love divine..ferh.

p/s: my blog wont be as active as it used to be. im hibernating.

the ambiguous darkness : night or morning?

2009-01-27T02:26:00.005+08:00

its 2.28 a.m now but i cant sleep.

i want to; i need to but i cant.
it is scary and you know it, for not being able to sleep when your mind and body beg for rest.
just like when you see or hear something, which you shouldn't,
just like when you know there is something watching you, but there is absolutely no other man,
while you lying on your bed, - as an escapism,
you pretend you are sleeping.
close your eyes tightly,
till you only see darkness with thousands of little red dot, and thousands of disturbing colours,
but still manage to see and even staring at the emptiness, a blackish savior.

you heard a voice, child's voice singing,

1,2,3,
dia pura-pura,
dia tutup mata,
nak tipu kita,
kakak...
tekala sapa saya!!!

wth, terpesong dari niat la pulak. maaf.

Budak Ben Yang Tak Bertamadun???

2009-01-26T14:58:00.004+08:00

a very short-short story. i really mean it. this is an old issue but it will never go away as long as there is a course called BENL in IIUM or as long as there are some sickening set of mentality in students of IIUM.(including lecturers!)

This happened last week on Thursday around 8 p.m. I was walking from my block to Asma' cafe to have a dinner with Fadz. then, i saw three girls were clearing up all those jumbo sale fliers from the walkway. as i was heading towards them,i heard...

"...menyampah betul. Hidup dengan budak Ben yang tak bertamadun..."

i was like dead near her face when she said the last sentence of her wise talk. we made eye contact or maybe face contact? what the hell is that? or maybe i should say we exchange our look? sounds weird?which one eh? aish...well, never mind. As usual, i gave her my genuine/original look. you know which, the one with no emotions at all.just looking into her eyes.(she was looking straight on my face too btw) if i were a man, she will stalked me.muahahaha...bad joke atip. as i took few steps from those circle of fitnah, they suddenly stop talking. the silence really surprised me. then i heard whispers.her other friend, a shorter one said something. i tried to detect what she uttered about but i cant. my ears are not as good as my 360 L + 250 R eyes. when i was about 5-6 metres away from them, without a warning, i heard a big explosion of laughter.

They knew that i am a Ben student.I guess.

fin.

very short indeed. Ben = uncivilized. that is a very simple yet stupid belief girls. come on, how old are you girl? i don't know which ben student you are talking about but hey, don't bring me down! do not include me (and others) in your hatred towards someone else. i wonder what made you labelled that Ben student as tak bertamadun? did she partying all night? she drinks alcohol maybe? she slept with her bestfriends's boyfriend? or did she crack? if she does, that is not uncivilized. that is a kind of lifestyle that is deviant from Islamic teaching which the westerners keep on promoting,unintentionally if some of you want me to add that. pfitt, who will believe that.
i don't know what makes you hate her but judging people is not your job. if you really cant control yourself from hating her, fine then, keep it in your heart or write it in your dairy.

it is a fact that i (we?) judged people too (see,see.past tense eh). i said bad things that i regret now and i change that bad habit or still in the process of trying to change it. its not easy, but it is not impossible.

the mind set that people have towards Ben student is not something new. since my sis days, we already have this air. not only students, some lecturers too. saying that we are murtad for studying the kaffirun language. this topic sometimes is very stupid for people to discuss but it is very absorbing and disturbing to let go. it never fails to makes me wonder.

Smile again

2009-01-18T00:17:00.000+08:00

salam everyone...

now, this is my first post in 2009 eh. so many things happened lately, good things of course. mama marina have her own blog, i moved in to Hafsa, i have new friends as well as met my old ones, keep in touch with my high school girlfriends, i have new hobbies, reading and talking and walking; fast. the only sad thing that i have to face for now is i cant buy books that i want as one book cost more than RM30 and that 30 ringgit can supply me food for 4, 5 days. aish. money2.

as for Hafsa, i now can call my compartment as my room! though hafsa's room is smaller than Maryam's but for me, the room really cries privacy and comfort. i just love it. before i forget, i reaaaaaly appreciate those who helped me with my thingsssssssss and those lovely princess are Bella, Mimi, Fadz, Adib, Hanis, Huda, Fae and Nad! TQ VERY MUCH. God, i never realize that i have a lot of stuff till i packed them. excluding boxes of my PC, I have 2 really big bags for my cloths and books, and more than 3 storage boxes with 3 smaller bags. for my PC, theres 5 boxes. so, no wonder eh why theres 8 people helping me to moved out. ^_^

as for my new roommates, they are just lovely and friendly. they talked to me first which i really hoped and appreciate for as I'm not a first person to open my mouth to strangers, even classmates. i cant handle it, for me its too embarrassing. its weird but I'm just shy.its just awkward and weird and idk. if i have white skin, they will turn pale or red. thanks god I'm not. the second day me stayed there, they invited me to have breakfast with them, in Ainul's room. we chatted like we've already know each other. talking.laughing.smiling.eating.drinking.good.

so, for this semester, i took Arabic class, 3 irk subjects, presentation skills and novel class. so far its been good but i need to give more concentration or priority to Arabic. its been almost 2 years i don't open my Arabic textbook. and now, only a quarter remain in my brains. i really need to master back my superpower called recall. I'm in a regret land for deleting almost all my Arabic in my knowledge files that i learned in matriculation. now, i need to scratch from beginning. but, there wont be too much a problem as my new roommates are all good in Arabic's. Ainul is TASL student while Is and Sumayyah are IRK students. really grateful for that.chincha,chincha.

and just as i thought everything went smooth, suddenly theres a news that change my life. no water supply in UIA. as i live in fifth floor, the highest of them -mahallah- all, the water cant reached to my floor. losing their game to gravity. not knowing that other level in the same building with me still have this precious crystal, i went to Maryam,walked, with sweat on my face, with sun being over excited, as nature called me. but, seriously, i don't really feel troubled. i don't have problems with not being able to take a bath or wudhu' or used the toilet. Alhamdulillah.

simply put, life is getting fabulous than ever. i learn what is freedom on a higher level, what it is to stand alone and proud of it, what it is to be a lone ranger and what it is to be a part of others life. me now, walking with hands swaying front-back, back-front freely, not bothered by small yet lots of sands of regret as i now finally noticed the winds of happiness, caress my body, drying my sweat. I'm in love of myself. I'm happy and i cant stop smiling.

oh sarang, sarang ohhhh.....

Nana tag Atip lagi...^_^

2009-01-17T23:29:00.002+08:00

- Have you ever dreamt of dating younger guy?

yes. btw, i have no restriction when it comes to age.

- How is it different to date yunhanam rather than older/same age guy?

i dont know. never have the experience.

- If you're chosen to be the noona in Yunhanam, what type of activity you'd like to do with the boys?

go to their practice rooms so that i can learn their dance moves and go to fun-fair. i have never been there. it must be really fun to play around with them.

- Will you choose your yunhanam based on their performance/attitude during the date and activity or you'll simply choose your favourite Shinee member from the beginning? why?
again, im not sure. i guess i stick with Minho. i cant watch em vids without looking at anyone else but him. the first time i see him, i know i like him. that is the extent of me fan boying him.

- Would you rather have 1-1 date or 5-1 date with the boys? why?

im quite greedy, so all of 'em.fosho.

- Is there any of the boys that meet your "prince charming" figure? who and why?
Choi Minho. he have the aura of prince charming. plus, he is the Charima Minho rite? hahahaha

- How will you tell them the result? (e.g: giving rose like the 1st noona, giving lifejacket like the 3rd noona, etc)

i'll hold his hand. smile to him and tell him that i want to know more about him. then quickly take him away. hahahaha...hey, im noona. and im hell full with charisma too...muahahaha

- What song do you want Shinee/your yunhanam sing in front of you? (apart of Noona Neomu Yeppo! haha..I know everyone wants them to sing this song for us!)

rainbow by Tohoshinki.

-Anda mula blogging sejak?
2008.

-Apakah / Siapakah yang mendorong anda untuk mempunyai blog sendiri?
x.k.u.a.s.e.k.n.a.h and myself.

-Nama blog anda?
lovely light

-Mengapa anda memilih nama tersebut?
that is the first thing that comes to my mind when i see the picture on my blog.

-Adakah anda mempunyai ramai rakan blogger?
no.

-Adakah anda benar-benar mengenali mereka, atau sekadar rakan alam maya?
i know them.

-Berikan 5 blog yang menyenaraikan anda sebagai rakan, dan apakah nama yang digunakan mereka untuk link ke blog anda? Adakah mereka menggunakan nama yang sama, atau berlainan?

huda: Atip
hanis : Atip (Awatif)
mimi : Awatif Azizan
nana : Atip-san
mama : Atip Charisma

~i love my name and my nickname. so simple i could die~

Sila tag 5 rakan anda yang lain.
sila layan diri.

p/s: nape separuh soalan Melayu and the other half English?hahahaha....

the last post before i go to my war zone

2008-12-19T23:07:00.002+08:00

2 more days and i and all xkuaseknah people of course need to register mahallah. beautiful uia, wait 4 me eh.... 6 weeks of holiday give great impact to my mind, body and soul. so, i think i'll have 3rd sem every year. 3 months of holidays, i'll be zombie.

idk how to link my previous topic to what im gonna write after this. em em, nope! not that idk, that would be ridiculous, i just dont care.

i have so many vids to watch, but i dont have time. and i wont waste my time solely to watch vids. i need to eat dude! man, im hell serious. but of course, i still watch 1-2 dozens of videos per day.

i forget to register/add subject. so i have to do it manually.

i forget to wish mimi happy birthday. i thought her beday was 23rd not 15th. im so sorry!

i forget to buy new shoes. well, i'll just wait for ptptn. i dont have enough money to splurge on new shoes btw.

i forget to wish my nephew happy birthday. well, he is only 2 and he dont even understand yet my language which i have already mastered his.

i have 2 new pimples. everyone can see from 100 metres away. well, who cares, only me.

i have to accompany my sis register her class at UM and we only know how to get there, not sure how to go back home. thanks to new u-turn road. but of course, if we lost, at least i know we are still in malaysia.

i have so many things to write, but i need to register new subjects. my credit hours right now is only 10!

jsged ygqubfuy ugqf qeb cjebfhrfeu fgaqlf duqfu hdfbf jbfgghi vhkgnkgu hegegeg!!!

p/s: yunho, i love you. but please stop showing your abs. its too hot that our world will face new virus: H.S.Y stands for Hot Sexy Yunhorous. symptoms: nose bleeding, cant close their mouths as the muscles around the lips have cramp which leads to excessive droolings and patient eyes will not blink for several minutes, and some cases, hours. some patients went to coma condition. only to wake up to watch the complete bolero MV.

heweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

The cute bartender 2

2008-12-16T22:03:00.004+08:00

so, midori-san and xkuaseknah people, here is the earlier part of the vids of the previous cute guy, unfortunately, no subs. im sorry babes. if i know hangul like the palm of my hands, i'll definitely subs all the vids that you like. definitely!

sometimes action only is quite enough for us to understand the whole situation. especially with this cute, innocent guy. so, here is the first part but he only appears at 6:09 and here is the second part. he showed a performance that ends up burning his hand a lil i guess, and the host cleaned ashes from his face. well, hot guy means hot. burn baby burn...oh yeah, at 7:45, the host asked sophia something like, what about you or what do you think (idk :P), and she replied, i'd marry him! no wonder he laughed so hard eh... the girls just basically went all-ga-ga-ing. hahahahha and the third part is the same part that we have already watch.

first part is not important i guess, but if you wanna watch him nearly fall twice but him, as a hot man still managed to maintain his hotness, then watch it.

p/s: not to forget, gold credits goes to sylverstarlite!

The Bartender and his Dear.

2008-12-13T22:29:00.005+08:00

girls, watch this.

i just happened to watched " chit chat of beautiful ladies" which has been subbed on KBS.

This guy, Jong Dong Ock i guess is a friend of one of the panel there. when he walks down to the centre of the stage, nearly fell twice btw, all the girls and guest when all-ga-ga. who not? he is tall, handsome and oozes charisma. he was supposed to make a cocktail as he is a bartender, but out of nervousness, his 9 years of making coctail experiences dissapeared temporarily. he looks so innocent when his hands are all shaking. but he managed to do it. after that, he performed the "fire came out from mouth thing" which is suuuuuperb cool but he end up burning the table. LOL. and he quickly stamping the fire. that segment is supposed to introduce the panel's boyfriend. everyone is soooo curios for whom does this man belongs to. and the girl is Tatiana,if im not wrong. but, their relationship is only good friends. so, why does he appear in that segment. it is because he wants to confess his love to one of the panels there. simply said, watch the vid ourself.
im hoping someone can upload the whole segment cause he is just damn funny, and HOT.

my mum said she has beautiful eyes and koreans there said that she looks like Park Jung Ah from Jewelry. yep, our baby, one more time song. im proud that there is a Malaysian representatives there.well, malays are all around the globe you know.

p/s: my mum starts to love watching KBS. hahahah...especially Love in Asia. and my sis just love DBSK! Im a good preacher arent me?

MINHO

2008-12-09T12:47:00.012+08:00

HAPPY 17 MINHO!!!

im happy2. kya... y so hot minho?...KYAAAAA...
ahaha..im totally in fangirl mode right now. and im spechless. just too happy for minho.
he must be really happy right now.ahahaa
here some pic of him.get it from shineee forum.

hahaha...i have reaaaaaaly good taste!
cutie since kid~bulka minho~

lets see the result...

2008-12-04T22:56:00.002+08:00

no. not our exam result but the result of my skin.
i use a new product for my face that attract lots of bacterias and dirt causes pimples which resulted to lots of acne scar. thanks to stress and menstrual period. my sister recommended me to try Tia Amelia and i did. but i dont buy the whole product as i have a very tight budget. so, i just bought the soap, krim kunyit( i dont remember what kunyit stands for rite now) and whitening creme. my sister said that i can see the difference in 2 weeks. urm....no, she is not a sales girl. to make it short, im doing an experiment to see whether Tia Amelia works or not. its like Mythbuster you know. whether a malaysian face product really works as promise, to what they always said: " lihatlah kesannya hanya dalam 2 minggu!". busted or not, you the xkuaseknah people will judge it.

honestly, i reaaaaaaaly hope it works. i wants to collect schilling not scars.

a-hah 2

2008-12-01T22:17:00.002+08:00

so...the result is already out, today not 15th.

the result is just the same, like previous semester, and before that, and before before that!

3.2 hmmmm...is this somehow my lucky number or my bad luck number?

i guess ive got the "Wrong Number"! muahahahaha.. XD

i dont think i can apply for scholarship ya noe.

i seriously dont feel anything, not sad, not happy but a bit surprise...

i get A- for HEL!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA

you r too kind Mdm Normala O. tq

so girls, hows yours?

a-hah

2008-11-27T20:19:00.002+08:00

well, exam result will be out on 15th dec.

dats quite a long time ya noe.

n i just cant wait to see what ill get after spitted curse on de paper ( n lecturer)

my bad.

2008-11-25T23:09:00.002+08:00

girls, how are you? im wondering is Bangi, Putrajaya and JB raining right now. i bet Putrajaya is not having rain right now but having rainism. XD Benta is getting colder and colder each day thanks to the rain. is it rainy season already? if yes, i surely need to kep up with the world, not youtube. :P btw, i have smtg to share with you, a story you can call but i call a realization.

my dad, abah i call, haru haru is getting older. logically of course, it did not really hurt as we too getting older in every second but physically. when i was form 4, the day i regestered in technic school is a day where everyone stared not at me but at my father. he looked clean with no moustache and beard, wear office attire and looked all dashing with his serious face. my friend a couple month later my friend asked me how old is my dad, i said 53. she was shocked cause my dad looks like 40+. all my roomates said that my father look younger than his age. now aged 57, my dad right now sleeping in the living room in his home when he was young. it is raining right now, the air must be too cold for my dad as hecovered is wholebody with blanket and he must be really tired as he sleep with his batik clothes that he wore to go to the mosque, which he used to wear to go to the office. but, that is not the matter, the main thing that i see and after live for 20 years and 7 days is that, abah tak pernah ada baju tidur. mak pun tak da. and i have 3.

this is what i do

2008-11-25T20:06:00.003+08:00

5 weeks and 5 days is totally long for me to spend in my house. it is not that i dont want to stay with my parents or what, it is just that i have nothing, zero things to do here except being a good daughter which i scored 40%. 39% i got by not give them a hard time.

so, to kill all the B (bored not bitch) virus i have inside my body, i end up doing these:

Totally youtube-ing. i watched all the videos i kept on missing especially DBSK, SNSD and Shinee. but oh my, Shineesubs got deleted! im totally into Factory girl, Family Outing,WGM, 3D2N. just looove them.

I read comics. ive finished reading One Piece, cant wait the next chapter, the 245th chapter BTW. besides that i do read other comics too but as far as i have read, they cant beat One Piece.
if you guys know some great comics out there, please share it with me.

i watched movies. from youtube. Oh my, we dont have cinema or speedy here. net is the only way. though the quality is far from comparison, but those movies on youtube still can make me cry...like always. so far, ive watched Mundy Thursday, Miracle on the 1st street and Marrying a highschool girl. i dont think mama have these movies. Mundy Thursday has slow plot. so for those who is not into this type of movie, too bad for you guys cuz the ending make me cried badly!

Mundy Thursday
genre: sad ~ is about a single woman, youngest of her family, a rich family btw and work as a professor tried to commit suicide, 3 times actually but end up breathing still. she has this hatred towards her high maintainence mother and treat her badly. her aunt is a nun and she works in a prison. she brings her neice to meet a prisoner who wanted to see her because his already dead blind little brother love listened to her voice when they were little. she sang the national anthem when she was a student on TV. he and his brother are homeless btw. haru haru, they build a friendship between them as she always visit him every Thursday and she also tell her dark secret to this man who is waiting for his death sentenced for killing a housemaid and her secret is the reason why she hates her mother. the man also shares stories about his life and his crime. they also begins to have feelings to each other which they do not realize yet, and she tried to find ways to lessen his death punishment but it doesnt work. he died by this hanging kind of punishment before they can celebrate his birthday which they have promised and before he can get his present that he wants; a Nike shoes that his brother want before he died when they were kids.
if you dont have time to watch all of it, just watch the finale. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqeWlzc7e4w huhuhuhu...so sad and that man looks like T.O.P in certain angle huwaaaahhhh...

Miracle on the first street
Genre: Sad and comedy ~ a sad comedy story but with happy ending. all kinds of emotions you can feel in this movie. and the 2 little siblings are just soo adorable and you cant help but have pity on them. very talented child actors. most of the time, i think they lead the story. i gred them as MUST WATCH.

Marrying a high school girl
Genre : Comedy ~ hehehe...the hero is eun ji won from 3Days and 2 Nights. yup the rapper who has this muka seposen. i laughed by only watching the first 2 minutes of the movie. and WARNING: ada nampak punggung laki tu. so, tutup2 la mata. the heroin is the girl in The Bodyguard drama aired in KBS now. soooo cute! and the conclusion that i can make is that Eun Ji Won should stay in variety show. it is so-so in this movie. the only rock in this story is the the plot, the heroin and her deadly kick!

you know what, i feel very thankful for those that keep on uploading videos for strangers like me to watch. they spend so much time and energy to cut, upload and subs the videos. they ROCK!

oh yea, why dont you guys take a look this channel. looks interesting. a collection of short film about ghost from The Original Japenese Theatre. mt37222. i dont watch it yet, the comments make me think twice. id love to know your comment first before i start screaming.

a new problem?

2008-11-25T20:00:00.002+08:00

i think i gain some weight.

my solution?

drink at least 1.5 litre of water and also fasting.

wait...no exercises?

NO. and THAT is the problem.

I listen and I feel it

2008-11-19T20:27:00.005+08:00

Girls/Guys,

you might have listen to this but if you don't, please do so....

Epik High

Habit feat. Ha Dong Kyun listen to it from the start till the end and you'll know this song is different from other songs that is Korea. well, Epik High is different from other group. for me, they are like Beyond for Cantonese and Mandarin music, X-Japan for Japan, and here we have Epik High for Korea. they are the One. they are The Legend with evergreen songs, not included some of Beyond and X-Japan's songs btw. the bottom line is, Epik High= genius.

I dont know yet who is the man with such voice tat chills me but he has a new album, Wanted. well,he is surely wanted cause i'll definitely googling him after this. (ooohh...Im getting excited juz writing about him)

1 minute 1 second feat. Taru I cant stop listening to it! that is how crazy it made me. the MV is cool and the lyrics is sooo sweet, he described her x-girl small habits. what kind of guys can gives such detail if he is not totally into you? tis song, i cant let it go.

Umbrella feat. Younha this is quite an old song but my my, this girl can sing well.very well indeed. her voice is heaven and it really suit this song. she can sing the sadness to you.to me actually. i juz love the rap.the music.the singer.the DJ.the bear.and the guy that can make the worst thing look better than him.jk.the brain.

Brown Eyed Girls

Hold The Line feat. Cho PD their first song if i'm not mistaken.correct me if im wrong. these bunch of girls cant beat SNSD nad Wondergirls based on nice cloths, good coreography, and face(im sorry) but they can sing! and that is the most important thing.

How Come very addictive. i juz love to love it and happy that im in love with it! but their dance sucks.gomen.but, please3 listen to this song. this is the song that first made me searched about them on the net. totally loved. oh yeah, some of their songs featured MC Mong, KARA nad SG Wannabe. its more to ballad.

i think this is enough to share the drugs that i found expensive. im very generous. (proud proud)

me vs kids

2008-11-19T13:24:00.011+08:00

my level of anger almost pass its danger zone.

what happened?

kids really a good 'thing' to test your patience.
someone that is not related by blood nor flesh.
just address.

but people, i will try not to explode because then there is no use of all my prayers.
i just need to think positive.
these bunch of kids im talking about are my neighbours that my mom ajar mengaji. they jump and run like crazy in this kg home made from woods which has stand almost 100 years. dont they have brain or what??? i cant even practice my dance and exercise as i might make a huge hole inside my house. its a good idea too as i can see chickens make love under my house..
huhu..jk..oh i didnt mentioned about smg else that get on my nerves, but ill let it pass this time.
~the end~

next story please...

its an old story but i still want to share it.
we went to the japanese summer festival and it is quite so-so 4 me.
mama huda tried yukata, mimi bought presents 4 her sister and mom and atip bought food. what else. LOL. and it was superb. i dont remeber its name but there has rice, fish and something yellow. and all of them excite my taste buds. heaven delicious. this makes me want to marry a japanese chef even more...muahaha...and me also played a game. i only ave to pay RM5 and get this three gelung( i dont remeber eng word 4 it) and throw it to things tat i want out of hundreds tgat is scattered on the floor.(PD: the number has been exxagerated to impress te audiences) and i got these...no,not the tickets. we paid 4 tat.

mama huda gave me pre-birthday presents.. arigato ne..

ahh...there you are....

dont me and mimi look sweet...muahaha...

and the other half...

very contrast. MUAHAHAHA

WTH with me!! please excuse Atip's english. like usual.

I'm back...for a while

2008-11-19T12:55:00.005+08:00

first of all

its my 20th birthday
this year is special because this is the first time my mom bought a cake without me knowing and there was also a wish on top of the cake!! hehe...(proud daughter)

my family usually (always actually) celebrate my (9) siblings birthday with these snacks.

we never miss it!!! what a simple life, right? and im lovin it. ^^ (smile smile)

and o course not forgetting your effort to type me a message wishing me happy birthday and remembering my birt date...(really proud of you girls)
nisa,awnie,mimi,hanis, arigato gozaimas!!!...please keep on supporting me ya...i love you my fans!!! muahahaha

im in a good mood today.. i hope it last till night.

...

2008-11-17T17:53:00.000+08:00

it has been a while
but it will never be forever

In a box...no more

2008-09-29T21:54:00.002+08:00

i think i might stop with all of this blogging thing for a while.
until when...is impossible for me to say.
reasons why is because i starts to see things i don't see before.and i really wants to appreciate it.
maybe i saw it but then people forget.
blinded by unimportant things or people.
i guess i had it enough with all the ridiculous things or persons that i focus or gave attention to.
i will put an end to this.
whatever it is, I'll be back for sure.anew me, i hope for better.

important notice.

2008-09-07T14:45:00.002+08:00

i am deeply sorry to inform that please do not sent any message and call me due to the fact that my hand phone is going to 'rest' after a non-stop working for 2 years and of course, after an uncountable times of fell due to his (my phone sex is male) mentally retarded owner. to make matter worse, i left my mobile phone charger at home. although i know i hardly received a message in a day, i still think it's my responsibility to tell this to all the people that hardly sent me any message nor call me. if you want to communicate or see me, there is several ways to do. which is :
1) please come to my room. you know where but if you are too lazy, you can
2) telepathy me or if you do not have this superpower, you can
3) say it in your heart. because i know in your heart, there is me.

with lots of love,
yukilili.

Nana loooove to Tag me....(n_n)

2008-09-06T23:35:00.003+08:00

#Have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?
- no. i will if someone 'meminang' me.

#What were you doing at 1 am?
- sleep.or force myself to sleep.tonight, revise hel.

#What was the reason you last cried?
- the thought of I might not live anymore to make my dreams come true.have my own family,career and enjoying happiness together with my parents.

#What are you seriously wearing?
- you mean,right now? yellow 'baju kelawar'. my aunt gave it to me.

#What are you doing tonight?
- read chapter 4 and 5 of HEL book.textbook actually.

#Do you clean when you’re upset?
- clean what? clean myself or clean my compartment? i do not clean anything. i just sit down and not moving, only staring into spaces.with my killer stare.minho learned it from me.

#Would you ever dye your hair blue?
- No. haram. btw, what for?

#How many pairs of shoes do you own?
- shoes? hmmm...ima wa, four. but one of it, does not fit my size.

#Do you usually tell people when they hurt your feelings?
- No. i keep it inside and think why do they act such behave.

#What's on your mind right now?
- i dont know. when i think that i think about hel, i actually think about all the viruses in my computer and then quickly i think about my roommate, Nad. so, i'm not sure.

#How have you felt today?
- energetic in the morning, happy in the evening and quite sad during tarawikh.

#Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?
- Yes.

#Did you cry today?
- No.

#Do you miss anyone?
- Yes.

#Who knows your biggest secret?
- me, myself and I.

#Who was the last person to hold your hand?
- I can't remember. salam masa terawih la kot.i'm not into skinship but sometimes i do like
someone holding my hand.enuff.

#How many windows are open on your computer?
- one.

#What do you hear right now?
- bunyi kipas ku yang bising. and keyboard ku berbuny time aku tengah mengetik.

#How many hours did you sleep last night?
- idk.

#Are you waiting for something?
- waiting for Minho to open his mouth.

#Does anyone hate you?
- maybe. idk. btw. i don't care.

#Who was your last call from?
- i can't remember. i call people but only silence call me.

#Have you ever ran away?
- no. I am a good daughter somehow.

#Can you run a mile?
- of course! i'm very confident. wanna bet with an ex-hockey player?hee~

#Who's voice did you hear last?
- Nad's voice.

#Did you kiss or hug anyone today?
- sentuh pipi dengan pipi nad.masa terawih.

#Did you speak to your mother today?
- No. tepon rosak.and charger tertinggal kat umah.

#What is the last movie you watched?
- in cinema? i can't remember but cite lawak bodo.
dvd mama, Nae Sarang. must watch. i cried.terribly.

#Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?
- anything,no. i talk about certain topic to people depend on their maturity and way of thinking.

#Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?
- Yes.

#Do you like someone?
- Yes. cometa. yunho.obviously.minho.and i can feel that i started to pay attention to Onew.

#Has anyone disappointed you recently?
- recently,no.maybe yes.idk.i tend to forget things immediately.

#How late did you stay up last night and why?
- 2.00 a.m ++.because i can't sleep? i drank my self-compartment-made=hot Neslo.

HUDA!!!!!

2008-09-06T16:16:00.002+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HUDA.

~HUDA20HUDA20HUDA20HUDA20HUDA20HUDA20~

I' m sorry I didn't wish you earlier. blame my phone.
so, please recieve my and be happy ya!

My invisible wings you’ll see once you gone.

2008-09-05T20:38:00.004+08:00

Under my wings,

Under my broken wings,

I’ll shower you with love and protection.

It is all under my invisible wings.

Stand beside me,

Hang on to me,

And find me if you want to.

And go away if you want to.

But please go away secretly,

As how you came to me,

With a sad face crawling in pain of loneliness, silently.

B word

2008-08-31T22:44:00.000+08:00

I am BORED because I am BORING.

NAE MINHO!!!!!

2008-08-31T16:25:00.006+08:00

(crdts to : imop)

WTH?????? this 'horse game' is not a game people!
LOL....i couldnt believe my eyes when i first saw this pic...
and look at Minho's expression. he looked very uncomfortable and awkward,
but his expression is priceless. hehheee...this is what i called smexy.
Key and Taemin reaaaaaaaly enjoyed their ride on Onew hyung and Jonghyun hyung.
most importantly, I'm soooo in love with them. and i have this habit of only watching Minho. Nae Minho to be precised. Muahahaha....

Ahlan wa Sahlan Ramadhan!

2008-08-28T07:46:00.003+08:00

wahaha...i can't wait to fast. this is because i want to wake up early and Sahur. And of course to look at others closing their eyes but their mouth still munching the food!!! and talking while looking like a mad woman. wait! Hanis and Fae are woman. Me and Mimi are still girl while Huda, she is not a girl not yet a woman. MUAHAHAH.... hihi..today we are going to celebrate Hanis birthday though her actual birth day is 29th August. why? because she wants to go back home early and she has no class this Friday! Aigooo...jealousy starts to mountain up my heart and sadness too.

Agree or disagree?

2008-08-28T01:30:00.001+08:00

Silence kills a woman.
But it heals a man.
Because,
Woman kills silence
And man always live with them.

kiss of smile

2008-08-28T01:06:00.001+08:00

Do you know what ‘a kiss of smile’ is?

…

Are you thinking?

Or you just want to read it here?

…

If that so, should I share it with you?

…

HIGH

2008-08-24T10:46:00.001+08:00

When you're close to tears remember
Some day it'll all be over
One day 'we're gonna get so high
And though it's darker than December
What's ahead is a different colour
One day 'we're gonna get so high

And at
The end of the day
We'll remember the days
We were close to the edge
And we'll wonder how we made it through
And at
The end of the day
We'll remember the way
We stayed so close to till the end
We'll remember it was me and you

'Cause we are gonna be forever you and me
You'll always keep me flying high in the sky of love

Don't you think it's time you started
Doing what we always wanted
One day 'we're gonna get so high
'Cause even the impossible is easy
When we got each other
One day 'we're gonna get so high

And at
The end of the day
We'll remember the days
We were close to the edge
And we'll wonder how we made it through
And at
The end of the day
We'll remember the way
We stayed so close to till the end
We'll remember it was me and you

'Cause we are gonna be forever you and me
You will always keep me flying high in the sky of love

High, high, high, high...

nae mission 2

2008-08-23T19:13:00.004+08:00

If you read all my entries, (you are a potential stalker!) 2 of them are list of things that I wanted to achieve. Unfortunately only some of them I managed to hug while the rest I have or might kissed goodbye.

To refresh your as well as my memories, the lists are;

to lose weight
fasting every Mon and Thursday
eat healthily
get 3.5 CGPA
Watch horror movie with all x.k.u.s...e.k.n.a.h people
change vices to virtues
appreciate every little things
be positive
save money
make new friends
be independent
give as well as receive love
And last but not least smile.

some might say this mission is not as challenging or important compared to winning Nobel Prize for example but, in this real world it is equally challenging and important as we need to shape our character first before we shape others. So, to save my energy from mengetik banyak, the one that I type in purple - I managed to achieve, blue - not yet started, brown - sometimes you see it, sometimes you don't and red - bahbai.
so, yes I have loose some weight, I once fast but never after that, I do eat healthily (I think), I don’t think I can get 3.5, x.k.u.a.s.e.k.n.a.h people are too busy sleeping and studying (?) and lead our own life to spare some time to watch horror movie together, I wont say anything about all the brownies (sometimes, English is very funny), I have quite a new friends through classes and PGG (personal growth group), I am independent, love? following Malaysian singer Siti Nurhaliza, I’d say: no comment. Last but not least is smile. Unfortunately, I smiled too much people looked at me weirdly and in one incident i got a phone number from a complete stranger. This is what I called ~the power of smile is in your hand~. heard somewhere huh?

oh btw, what do you think of this picture? she looks magnificently lovely and gave mysterious aura at the same time. and her baju is kinda cute. so, let me present to you, Horikita Maki.

let us together sleep and never wake.

2008-08-23T18:08:00.003+08:00

let us together
smile and laugh
run and jump
eat and play
love the happiness
and together walk back home
to be segregated by a place
home.
let us together
here
looking up to the moon
laying next to each other
breathing silence
seeing air
sleep and never wake
sleep and never wake

Nana tag aku weh...

2008-08-23T14:29:00.004+08:00

[1] Nama timangan -
Atip,wawa,X-Japan,Winter Sonata.

[2] Anda seorang yang -
pelupa, multiple personality. (that tells all)

[3] Insan teristimewa. Apa yg membuat dia terlalu istimewa?
parents.coz disebabkan diaorg kahwin kita ada.

[4] Makanan -
Seafood, yong tau foo, steamboat, choc and cheese cake, ice-cream, yogurt,
spicy food and all kinds of makanan berkuah.

[5] Favourite colour (s) -
purple,brown,peach,white,black. an enemy of striking colours.

[6] Favourite song (s) -
this is a very tough question. i breath them. atm, i listen to 'haru haru' by

Big Bang.

[7] Benda yg membuat anda stress.
PEOPLE.

[8] 3 benda dalam wallet -
IC, muamalat card and money.

[9] Kali terakhir menangis beriya-iya.
can't remember. even if i remember, i wont tell you.

[10] Tag rakan anda.
hmmm...korang,kalau nak wat, wat sendiri.

bulla

2008-08-23T14:22:00.003+08:00

...i'm bored...
...mentally retarded...

but i managed to lose some weight.

too deep

2008-08-14T00:34:00.000+08:00

I’m going crazy…this world is full with colours that are so mesmerizing yet they are people making this colourful colour turning all black. They stained their painting which is fine with me but do you need to splash black dirt to others painting too? Can’t you see that our painting is hanged next to each other? Everything is so black and empty but man keeps on saying its nothing. It’s because their heart has turning black and they are blind to things that they are suppose to see. Guess this is what happens when people only see what their eyes want to see. Their mind knows that everything is so wrong, negative and dark but their emotion is what they put on first place. First thing first they said. Selfish I’d say. You can only say it’s not selfish if one thing benefits you but did not cause harm to others. Aren’t you now hurting people around you and yourself? Isn’t it selfish when you see your weaknesses as your reasons for you to not be punished by your own wrong doing? You do not have any right to mentioned or said what kind of people you hate if you are just what you read earlier. If you don’t understand what you read is not your fault as I had mentioned earlier, people only see what they want to see. You told me very long yet wise philosophies of yours according to logic and Islamic point of view yet you are behaving just the opposite of what you see and understand. You took things for granted, you hurt people’s feeling, you are being selfish, you are being irresponsible, but why do people still stand besides you? Because they know that this is all a mistake. And you agree with them as you said to err is human. But, this saying is not for you if you keep on repeating the same mistakes over and over again. At first I want to call this situation as ‘blind stupidity’ but this is wrong as it is not blind who is stupid or vice versa but it’s the person. So I said it with natural and simple way which is blind and stupid. Straight-forward is not my style as I believe that human taking lessons by experiencing itself and by thinking.

what will you feel...

2008-08-14T00:29:00.002+08:00

what will you feel

when you want to cry but no tears flowing out

when you want to hear sounds but hear silence

when you want to talk but no words coming out

when you want to run but you cant move a step

when you want to live but they knew not your existence

and when you want to go far away please no they say they need you

now what will you feel

If we together sleep and never wake

If we together sleep and never wake.

Rainbow’s Love

2008-08-07T22:51:00.000+08:00

I want to see a rainbow.

And I want to see it with someone, a stranger.

And he does not say anything to the rainbow, to me and to himself,

And I too do not say anything to the rainbow, to him and to myself.

While standing next to each other, we will just looking at the beautiful colour.

Together appreciate the existence of the rainbow, which gives me and the stranger a new day.

Together, the stranger and I see a new journey. A journey called We.

...

2008-08-07T22:38:00.002+08:00

Regret can kill a person but he dies not, only despair.

The Silence

2008-07-30T23:40:00.004+08:00

Silence kills a man’s spirit.

Numb a heart- cold. With no sound but may-

be a breeze of air.

To merry a soul-who was bound to despair,

A man’s spirit must kill The Silence.

That appears in the room of emotion,

the suicidal heart (screaming for air).

Its been a while...

2008-07-30T22:53:00.002+08:00

i didn't post any entry. if i have time to do it, i still have problems in how to write things as sometime words could not described what your heart really feel. i'm quite busy this semester as i have 3 presentations and 2 paper work. besides that i have to accompany my sister to The Lost World of Tambun in Perak ( what do they mean by lost world btw?) and then have to accompany her again to PD. right now i have problems log in to mypsychlab. this thing always bothered me since i first reg. menyusahkan betul. relax2.bende remeh jer tip..huhu...sabar..

HELL?

2008-07-20T10:23:00.002+08:00

For unBenl student ( ok ok i created it.again.) you'll think of the angry fire burning and torturing those whom commit great sin to God but for Benl student, it means History of The English Language. some call it HOTEL. whatever. as nobody knows, tomorrow July 21st, I'll have HELL quiz which cover only 2 chapters but Madam Normala only thought one chapter only. She said that she do not prepare or think of what questions she want to ask until the night before quiz. previous semester student faced more difficulty. so I'll just bare with it. some people know that i love history but there are some conditions too. first, i prefer book with colorful papers or at least a picture or map so that i can see something else instead of alphabets. second, i prefer to read a chapter earlier but with a little introduction from the lecturer. so that i know a little how the story goes. but, lecturers have their own style of teaching which they think are best for the students. and for that, students are the one who need to be flexible instead of complaining (like me). so, why don't we together (or alone) face this small challenges with positive attitude. it does not only good for our marks but for our attitudes too.

i'll make it short and bold

2008-07-19T18:19:00.003+08:00

I've lost 3 kilograms!

muahahaha...but of course i have a long way to go to get my ideal weight. as i'm 5'4 tall i should i guess weight around 55-51 kg. hmm...

HAPPY!

2008-07-16T21:48:00.005+08:00

Hello there, it's been a long time i did not post an entry right. well not right cause you don't even care if i post an entry or not ne? haha...I'm in a good mood today though i have a lot of assignments to do and not to forget, tomorrow I'm going to have a Q&A session for Usul Al-Fiqh. other than that is Psychology assignment AND homework, History of English language assignment and Phonetics and Phonology presentation. thank god as for History and Civilization there's no assignment but we'll have 2 mid-term papers and 2 quizzes. so. as you can see, this semester i took 5 subjects excluding Tilawah. i went to Tilawah class last week but Ustaz didn't show up and only 5 students came.WTH.

PTPTN dah masuk and that means i can spare some money for contact lenses. it's getting annoying dancing and exercising with my spectacles sliding down to my button nose. if i do not wear them i couldn't see clearly. ah, fyi ima wa I'm learning SNSD Kissing You dance. it's easy but too fast and my body is terribly stiff. apart from that it's fun dancing to 'Noona Nomu Yeopo' song but of course it's disastrous especially dancing with Huda. ahahah...you are so funny.

Today, i bought a book titled ' Panduan Tajwid & Taranum' by my Ustaz back in 2004 when i was in Teknik SP 1. Ustaz Haji Abdul Ghani Ariffin is so soft spoken and always smile that he can make you like him in just a minute. i still remeber him smiled at my Al-Fatihah recitation. hehe...i have problems in pronouncing some words. The main point is I'm very lucky that i got to learned Tajwid from Ustaz Ariffin and at the same time proud for buying his book as it can bring back memories although i have attempt to skip his class once and the fact that my tajwid is still so-so. now, i feel regret for not paying attention to his lecture. balasannya, dapat Tilawah 1.

oh yes! i have add new link which is DBSK fan and Hangul lesson web. for DBSK fan, please check her blog. She (aged 14!) posted quite a few pictures of our boys that can make you lol. i almost cried watching some of the pics. what if i put some of the pic? the rest you can check for your self. i found it when i was googling Naver. and btw now i can write and read hangul a bit. i can't write/read fast yet but it's improving. can't wait to take Hangul class yo. kupul duit kumpul duit...

pic source : Soompi, xietinlovehero and others unknown sources.

i can accept JJ, CM and Micky but HoSu especially Junsu, seriously mcm kena rasuk(possessed).

CM : WHAT? I'M HUNGRY OK! muahahaha...btw their backdancer looks like a male stalker watching them waiting for the right time to attack...hahahaha....

OK, maybe i'm a lil bit bias here but Yunho look soooooo cute in this pic..though i dont like his hair style and Micky's adam apple is so HOT. not to mention his lips. my favourite! and JJ, it's his habit.

New Semester

2008-07-05T23:57:00.003+08:00

tomorrow i will heading back to Gombak as classes will start this Monday. i will arrive there before noon i guess as my bus is at 8.30 a.m. i can't wait to start cleaning my new room cause it is incredibly dirty. i bet the person who last owned that room was fined. the floor is so dirty that it is nearly impossible to walk into my rooms without wearing slipper. plus i need to unpacking all those treasures of mine that is useless but i still keep it as my mind can't stop thinking 'what if i need them'..huh...I'm totally a freak when it comes to throw my things although it is just plain garbage..hehehe...ok i exaggerated a bit..and this sem will be a new experience for me, i hope so, as my schedule is different with all xkuaseknah people. i hope i can make a couple of new friends and hopefully i don't get any lecturers from hell...

p/s...abah beli sate wis...huhuhu...saja bagi besa...muahahaha

Sepet vs Bulat

2008-07-03T21:03:00.003+08:00

When I started this blog, I never have a thought about posting an entry related to my family cause for me it is a private matter...today, I changed my mind. Wonder what kind of supernatural power that leads me to do this? My mother on-off sixth sense; humour. This afternoon my sister, my parents and me went to K.L ( Kuala Lipis muahaha ) to seek a dentist. Last night Awnie cried quite badly and said that her teeth hurts. On the way back home we had to wait for my cousin Mimi to finish her class. We waited for more than half an hour. So, we killed our time by talking and laughing. I told my mother that my friends said that the sound that I made when I laughed is weird…and that Nadal called me audio while Hanis video..Then my sister ask my mother why is it in our family only atip mata sepet? Mmg soalan kurang ajar…my mother said that it is because we have a little Chinese blood running in our veins and body…(which is very little to be exact.we are more to Banjar+Malay) which her answer does not answer why me only…She told us that she has a friend that look like a Japanese cause his eyes are so sepet you couldn’t see his black eyes. And when he laugh you can only see a line..like this maybe..(-_-) ?? mauahahah.. While her other friends have mata bulat tapi hujung mata tetiba sepet…and this friend's younger sibling punya mata is totally sepet...she laughed like hell…poor that person…and suddenly my mom said out of sympathy…kesian dia…mata sepet ni cacat tau.macam ada kaki tapi xde, in a very serious tone and I was like..habis tu, mak kata atip cacat mak??? and mom was like..tak, tak, mak x kata kat atip...Owh god…I couldn't stop laughing for about 5-7 minutes…my mother reaction is totally unpredictable…

Maybe some of you said that my eyes is not sepet but if you compare my eyes with my family members…you will think I’m adopted…for now, i'll show you Awnie pic first...just scroll down and if you see a girl with big eyes, that's her.

92% and headache

2008-07-03T10:20:00.004+08:00

i just finished playing/stuDYING korean alphabet quiz just now and the result is i got 92% and as a bonu; headache...i'll give you the url later for you to try and if you are unlucky like me, you will have headache too...god, i need to lay down now...and btw, never do grammar quizzes
together with hangul...never...the result is more grammatical error...

boredoom

2008-07-01T23:15:00.008+08:00

ima wa, I’m bored...I have nothing to do and I’m slightly down today... I’m not going to tell you why as it will only make me feel horrible...at first, I wanted to post an entry about an article from Reader's Digest discussing elements that will lead to a happy life but as I’m unhappy today, I’ll post it later. Someday, when I can get back to my senses. Guys, I want to do something...my body, mind and soul crave for something that my brain do not know what...they just want something new...to be honest, I’m getting bored with this blog...I started doing this because I wanted to share something, to talk or whatsoever but now, I don’t think this thing gave benefits to me...now I realized that what I really want is to talk to someone....verbally....I do have friends but I just can’t let the words slip easily from my mouth...I feel that for each person that I know, there is a certain limit or certain way of approaching....for example, with A, I can laugh with her, tease her or even lay beside her but to tell her what I view life as is totally unimaginable. That is all that I can share with her. for me, each of every person that I befriends with will received different kinds of 'service' or approach from me...sorry, I cant think of other words besides 'service'...as with A, she see me as a good person as I treat her nicely while with B I might act like a serious, matured or angry person, with C I might act like her friends that she can always rely on, someone that will stand up and fight with anything or anyone that hurt her badly without any sound arguments while with D I might be a totally b*tch. Why? Because I treated people by the way she/he treated me...I’m a person who will expect 50% if I gave to him/her 50%...example, if I talk to him/her politely, I expect him/her to do the same. If I tease her, she can do the same...simple...if I received more than that, I’ll definitely treat her better as she deserves it but if I received less, it will hurt my feelings and I might treat her just like what she did to me...of course I do let certain things slip away or pretend not to see what they have done but if they take my careless attitude for granted and keep on repeating the same thing, they should be careful. There’s a bomb ticking waiting to explode inside me. People might say that if a person done bad to me it is maybe because I did the same thing to him/her...I do believe that. That is why even if I’m angry with someone, I still befriends to him/her as I think I probably hurt him/her. And as she gave me second chance by still talking to me, I will do the same...but as I mentioned earlier, there is a certain limit. You cross the line and you'll die. It has been 3 years since I last gave a person heart attack. my teachers and friends might wrote the incident in their dairies...jk...it did leave bad impression of me but I deserved it and that person who received my 'service' deserved it too...so, no regret..50-50...neither win nor loose. Some people might think that I'm inconsiderate which i don't mind as people would not expect me to be flawless then, which is a burden for a man.I'm a complex person. I’m a difficult person to be exact but trust me; if you leave good impression to me, I’ll certainly do the same...

angle will be treated like an angle...

p/s: as usual please excuse my grammar. (n_n)

nae mission

2008-06-30T15:25:00.003+08:00

Now, as Hanis has mentioned that she will post a new entry about her goal(s) for upcoming semester, I want to do the same too. Because I believe that once I post it here, it is like making a promise to myself and at the same time x.k.u.a.s.e.k.n.a.h citizens will (or will not?) make sure if I do everything that I want to achieve. Plus, it is good to have something to dream off rite? ahhh~nae~terapung-terapung ke awangan....

so; here is what I'm going to do starting this 1st semester of our 2nd year...

I want to loose weight by exercising (poco-poco and that English style abs-exercise), jogging and dancing (I have and am d/loading some dance step tutorial videos).
Fasting every Monday and Thursday. puasa sunat dong...mau cuci jiwa and perut. boleh dapat pahala!kena menabung pahala cepat2...saham dunia makin menjunam..
Eat healthily. My skin is getting more and more sensitive....oh yeah, remind me to buy Dettol...
Get 3.5 for CGPA. It’s getting boring having 3.1-3.2 only. And I can only achieve it by, STUDYING! What a surprise...
Watch horror film with all 5 of us once a while. hehe...mama kan dah ada....wahahah...mama,rindu cerita mama...
As well as continue with my previous missions (I posted in my blog last semester). Istiqamah is very important yo!
ah! and post a pic of my cute nephew...hehehe...btw, he called me 'akak'...ala ala comel, mcm makcik dier...

Hmm...it looks like (purple line, got to introduce myself?) I 'm going to have a very busy sem huh. So, how about you guys?

CERITA SERAM 2

2008-06-26T21:04:00.003+08:00

ok....lpas ak pikir camtu, ak pun cakap dlam ati..kalau hal ni nak berulang lagi, xleh kat tempat awam...bahaya...ak pon pk camne ni...ni msti ada kaitan ngan kes 'tarik' tuh...smbil ak pikir tu ak tutup mata...rasa tenang ckit tutup mata..mcm nak tertdo...tapikan, bila ak nak bukak mata, pandangan ak kabur!!! suma benda mcm jdi double...lama lpas tu pon pandangan ak masih sama..ak pun cari akal mcm mana nie..ak pun dapat idea, cari toilet!!!kat situ xde org.ak bangun ngan lembik nya tanya kat kerani toilet kat ner...kerani kata kna kuar ckit...xpela, ak jln jer..nak wat camna...explanation x membantu langsung...elok jer ak jln kuar dari pejabat tanah sambil mata mcm 'dikaburi', ak terduduk kat luar pintu pjabat tu...ak betul2 dah xlarat!

ak try bukak mata.tp still sama...suma kabur..bibir ak usah cakap...mmg sejuk gla...ngan perut, punggung and badan ak yang terhuyung-hayang.mmg seram...ak pk, ak nak mati dah ker ni??ni lagi kritikal dari dulu...tp ak kuatkan semangat...nak 'sakit' pun biar da gaya...kalau org tolong, malu lar...lepas lama gak ak terduduk xleh bangun tu, ak pon bangun...ak jalan mcm org mabuk korang tau!!!tp sorang pun wat bodo...alhamdulillah...jalan jalan jalan tu, kalau xlarat, ak tahan tangan kat keta yang tngh parking...yela xkan tahan tangan kat keta yang tngh jalan kan... xpela...pastu ak nampak krusi...ak pun rehat kat krusi tu kjap..truk x truk keadaan ak masa tu, ak terpiki nak mengaku kalah...ak nak baring jer kat bangku tu tunggu ambulans datang...tp bila pikir soal maruah, ak trus bangun...mmg time tu ak dah xtahan!!!

ak pun trus jalan...pastu terserampak ngan sorang pakcik ni...ak pun berdialog ngan pakcik ni..

Aku : pakcik, tandas kat mana?
Pakcik : Situ dik.(sambil menuding kat bangunan yang btol2 depan ak)

mmg rasa mcm bangang btol...tapi nak wat camna.pandangan ak terlalu kabur...mcm xpakai spek...ak pun cakap terima kasih.pastu ak ngan sepantas yang boleh masuk tandas tu...nasib baik xde org!!!ak masuk dalam tandas kecil and trus duduk...lepas ak keluarkan 'saka' ak, trus pandangan ak kembali seperti biasa...xlama lpas tu,ak cpat2 balik kat makcik ak..makcik ak xsedar pe yang berlaku kat ak...dah settle suma bende..ak pun citer kat makcik ak...and reply makcik ak : Atip dah x b^@$% air b*&%# bape ari?...
ak reply : 2 hari...

amacam???paham x?seram x cita ak???MUAKAHAHAHAHA...

CERITA SERAM

2008-06-26T20:46:00.003+08:00

korang korang...nak tau x cite seram...malam tadi kan ak tdo awal tau, kul 10 lebih cam2 la...umah ak mmg tdo awal...ak pon org tdo, ak tdo la...mula2 susah gak nak tdo...xsedap badan...tp ak paksa diri ak tdo gak...dah tdo tu, kul 2.35 pagi cam2 ak terbangun. rasa mcm kepala kena 'tarik'. ak tarik rambut ak balik..lama gak la tarik menarik ni berlaku...tapi ak wat bodo jer..ngantuk punya pasal...xpela...ak pun tdo balik...jam ak bunyi kul 5 pagi..awalkan? sebab sblum tdo ak kira kalau tdo pkul 10 kena bangun kul bape.so, dari 10 ke 5 da 7 jam...ckup ar tu...tapi disebabkan kes 'tarik' mlm td yang mengganggu tido ak yang sempurna, kira kena redeem lar...so ak bangun kul 6.45...

pas bangun tuh, pagi ak berjalan seperti biasa...ak mandi, bersiap nak teman makcik ak g pejabat tanah kat lipis...nak 2kar nama arwah wan ak ke nama makcik ak...xpelakan...pastu ok jela..no worries suma...tapikan, tetiba masa makcik ak masuk dalam pejabat, ak rasa bibir ak makin lama makin sejuk...nak kata pejabat tu sjuk, ak pakai sweater...ak rasa pening sngt...bdn mcm xseimbang..peluh sejuk menitik kat muka ak...perut ak mcm bergerak2 and punggung ak pun sakit!!!!ak rasa x sedap ati and x sedap badan...ak terpikir...PERKARA TU NAK BERULANG LAGI KE????

ha...amacam???nak tau sambungan dier x???tunggu jap...nak taip pun ak dah gabra...

For Huda

2008-06-25T00:35:00.002+08:00

SEE???? camna ak nak suka dia....geli geliman nengok...hahaha...mau ak da anti-fan kutuk ChangMin....

H.A.N.I.S

2008-06-22T01:51:00.003+08:00

hanis...read this and you will know why i quite 'malu' to post my result...

You must tell 2 people about this game in 22 days in order to make your wish come true.

jung yunho is the one that you love.

shim changmin is one you like but can't work out.

You care most about hanis.

awis is the one who knows you very well.

hasma is your lucky star.

rainbow is the song that matches with jung yunho.

whatever they say is the song for shim changmin.

love in the ice is the song that tells you most about your mind.

And darkness eye is the song telling how you feel about life!

Hanis...i care about you too arr...
and i cant believe that Changmin is the one i like but cant work out...its unthinkable for me to like him...p/s ChangMin fans..anyeong...hahaha....

Minna!!!! READ THIS!

2008-06-22T01:28:00.006+08:00

korang...ak smalam tido lambat..around 4 a.m as ak xleh tdo langsung...ak pon membunuh masa dengan wat quiz...and one of the quiz yang ak buat pasal cinta...and this is the result...100% CORRECT. korang try aah...best...tkan kat link ak:fun quiz.

This is ME :)
You are getting closer to being a True Love Magnet

You have thought about your relationships.
You have tried to change and grow.
You have worked on your dating choices. Good for you!
Yet you are still not getting what you want. You can’t seem to find a
partner whom you want to be with, who will love you the way you
want to be loved and will stick around for a long-term relationship.
Sometimes you may even feel like giving up on the whole dating
and relationship business. Deep inside you feel sad about being alone,
because you have so much to give, and so deep a need to be in a
loving relationship.
You know something is holding you back.
You just don’t know what it is.

EPPY BEDAY PAE!!!!

2008-06-22T01:04:00.009+08:00

Today is my friend's Faezah birthday and i have a present for you pae...jeng jeng jeng...

tengok cake ni tringat kat ko...hehehe...HAPPY 20!!!!

grammatical error

2008-06-22T00:30:00.003+08:00

my sister said that there are many grammatical errors in my blog...which I don't really care as for me, as long as people can understand what I have decoded, then that’s fine...today, she mentioned that her lecturer, a famous blogger-Tok Rimau mentioned in his blog that he knew there are some mistakes in term of grammar but guess what he jotted down at the bottom of his entry, "I know there are some grammatical mistakes but they are there to stay"...that’s really cool for English lecturer...but then, there are some people who will agree and disagree...that's your choice...for me, if you have time to go through your entry, then check your grammar. If not, just leave it. The most important thing is what you want to point out can be understood. Thank you.

Indifferent and uninterested...

2008-06-21T23:36:00.004+08:00

hmm....2 weeks holiday is too long for me to fill with activities a single person can do..if only my brother, Imran come back home, we'll definitely kills our time with fishing and feeding all those coward and hungry duck.
Just a few hours ago, i read my old Cleo magazine and found a fun quiz titled "do you have an addictive personality?". i read the result and suddenly...i don't know how to react. it is said that I'm an indifferent and uninterested kind of a person. guess what else.. it said that it is quite obvious that i do not have an addictive personality. In fact, i have a slightly scatter-brained personality. it is due to this, i dont have the concentration span to become addictive to anything. while i can be pleased that i dont have any obsessive character traits, i should pay attention to correcting my absent-minded behaviour.
I do agree with the result after a moment as I remember that this morning or yesterday (I can’t remember..I have short term memory. If you knock my head, I might have MML: major memory loss. Yes, I created it) my sister asked me if I listened to what she was talking about..As I did not show any facial expression and have no eye contact at all..to tell you the truth, I was listening to her (30%) and at the same time thinking about other things (70% : which can be divided into many things that I think at that particular time. as far as I remember, I was thinking what expression should I use to her as a reaction to what she was talking about-which ended up with zero reaction and which website I want to surf-as we were walking towards the computer)...see...maybe this is the reason why I have short term memory.

hmm...as I mentioned earlier, I do not know how to react...

Post Marathon

2008-06-20T13:55:00.003+08:00

My previous post mentioned that I don't know what to talk about. Now, I have come out with a conclusion that I want to express my feelings about what had happened in 3rd semester. Firstly, I probably won’t take short sem anymore unless I’m running out of time to finish all the subjects that is required b4 graduating. And some of my friends think the same way too. My short sem was filled with unsatisfied with a certain people. Especially a person who could not accept other opinions and critics but she can talk freely about other people. But then, it's her choice to behave like that and we should take lessons from it. Everyone have their own hamartia. That’s it. My sum 4 short smother end.

Aku Kena Tag

2008-06-20T13:27:00.003+08:00

5 hadiah yang saya mahu dan kenapa nak 5 hadiah tersebut

1. 10MILLION ntuk anta parents g haji n byr PTPTN trmasuk 1 family ak pnya pinjaman, blanja ckit n selebihnya derma disamping buka pusat bantuan 4 free di negara2 miskin.
2. YUNHO - AKU NAK KAHWIN NGAN DIA.
3. New Brain - ak rasa ak da memory loss n emotionally retarded. ada ke bnda cam tu?
4. FOOD - ak suka makan!
5. BABY - sbb nenek yunho nak cucu n ak nak hapus dosa2 ak dsamping memulakan hidup baru with my babe(yunho) n baby yang comey...

Sape tag saya?
hanis yang pemalas tp pandai.

5 impressi mengenai beliau.
1. pemalas.
2. tapi pandai.
3. pemalas.
4. tapi rajin tngk video.
5. n mesti nak naik taxi ngan Fae.

Perkara paling memberkas dia pernah lakukan.
memberkas tu apa? korang jgn wat ak rasa mcm bodo bm.

Most loved invention

invention? dr segi rekaan teknologi or ciptaan tuhan?
klu teknologi xde. klu ciptaan tuhan, manusia.

What I despise so much

i don't know.

5 orang yg kena tag
xda lagi.

ALERT!!! HOTNESS OVERLOAD!

2008-06-20T11:54:00.022+08:00

Wah...its been a long time eh....ima wa on my holiday but just for two weeks...i have lot of things to talk about but i dont know which one to post first...so, i made a decision to post pic of all the kpop and jpop actors or singers that i think 'floorless'....hahaha...so, check it out yo!

Lee Ki Woo...good looking n tall.

Miura Haruma...anak kucing...jgn mara mimi...

Jae Joong...what can i say...hanis, jgn epy sgt...

cHANG mIN...bohong la kalau kata dia x ensem...huda! gusi ko berdarah!hahaha....

Micky Yoo Chun.CUTE.MACHO.

No. 1 in my heart...zutto...Jung Yun Ho shi...

his tongue and his sexy eyes...

DANGER.Hotness overload!..please be my bogyguard..no! Hubby!!!

HISTORY!!!!!

2008-06-04T19:49:00.002+08:00

attention!!!hari ini tercipta sejarah buat pertama kalinya aku telah deposit duit!!!!!hahaha...sound pathetic heh...and next wednesday, ill deposit another RM100 which i had saved during this month...like i had posted earl;ier, my mission is to save money...and i did it...hope it will continue like this...hmmm...almost 75% of my mission i had accomplished ( tapi kena la istiqamah kan) but the hardest part is to think positive...huhu....coz dealing with people really gave you headache...especially with all the assignments and exam is just around the corner...but then everyone feels the same way too...huhuhu....

Gift for yourself.../ mission in the making...

2008-05-20T08:36:00.004+08:00

Change yourself from bad to good...and the outcome will definitely boost your life..as people will love you more and importantly, you yourself love the girl/boy inside of you....

Appreciate things even if it is small...i love this part as I'm a romantic kind of person (what??the test says that...not me), for me, if a man says that he want to give me a present and then show the 'present' which is the rainbow, i will definitely say yes!even if he didn't ask anything...hohoho...I'm already happy thinking about it...hahaha

Be positive...hhmmm....hard to master...but posting this post is one of a positive thing right..start slowly...

Save money...mmmmm....money is important, skang beras naik harga ooo....

Eat healthily, exercise regularly....i have to buy sport shoes first, then there will be no more excuse...love your body...

make new friends...hit my blog and be proud to have a new friend from Malaysia...

Be independent....being independent is reaaaaaally fun and adventurous...try it and you'll know it.

Love to receive and give love...especially from nice guy....hahaha...kiddin'....i love Malaysia!!!Majulah sukan untuk negara!!!!!(reader:wtf?)

Smile,smile,laugh...my expertise and my friends will agree with it...tend to smile and an explosion of laugh will follow even if I'm alone...this disease is called habit but my friend called it split personality.

Jejak kasih....

2008-05-18T21:17:00.005+08:00

I'm looking for my old buddies!!!!And new ones are welcome!!!
If you were born in 1988 and were form 1-2 in Sek. Men. Kg. Pasir Puteh in Ipoh please let me know...
if you were form 3 students on 2003 in Sek. Keb. Sri Mahawangsa in Jitra, please do the same...
AND, if your name or your friend's name is Ally Ng from Ipoh and was a student of MGS (if I’m correct),please alert me....I saw a video and one of the subbing team is called Ally, my instinct said that its her but there are thousands of people out there have the same name though....it's better to find your friend through friendster or myspace, as what my sister did and the outcome is something that can make your jaw drop...even her primary classmates get in touch with her back(and btw,her bf now is her ex-classmate in standard 4...huhu...feel happy for her but at the same time worried. she is older than me but less experienced in love relationship matters...) but I'm getting bored with those myspace and friendster....(and was lazy to on9 and now lazy to even check them) so, the best thing that I can do is through this blog...

slow down....

2008-05-18T19:58:00.003+08:00

People are not perfect
and that's the fact
where people acknowledge but forget
once your friends is caught on act
... is my lingo correct???
Hahaha...what do you think???Nice intro isn't it? Just came out from my brain to my right hand without me knowing it...well, just forget about it...

I've read a blog that talk(well not just talk but a lil bit of mock) her own friend....I found it a bit too harsh of her talking about her friend although she did not revealed which friend of her...people make mistakes, and others who watch know which is the best way of dealing the situation/problem and know if the outcome will turn out good or bad but when they are in the situation, the same mistakes happen...for me, Internet is not the place for you to talk bad things about him/her. its OK if your intention is to give lessons to others but with the correct usage of words....but the correct way is to talk to her face and it also depends whether he/she can take it or not...some people found it a bit harsh to say it on their face so that's where third party or intermediates exist. some prefer the other way as problem that occur should just be settled between those who actively involved...all I want to say is,

"friendship is a delicious and sweet fruits which you get from trees that you grew and took good care of as she/he is the seed while you are the soil and water is the pure heart of both parties, carbon dioxide is the sadness and tears that both sighs to each other shoulder and the sun is the happy, joy and priceless moments of you together."
(This theory by Yukilili can also be applied on love perspectives)

I used to have this kind of beautiful friendship but our ship sank as communication between us getting awkward which I believe she realize and yes, its my fault...once I got angry, I mock others who make my day gloom which resulted she afraid if she might hurt me as well and will face the same situation like others...I blame her not but if she can woke me up from the bad side of me that would be better and I will definitely repair our ship. I AM repairing our ship but she seems to left me alone with all the work...this happened because both of us have telephones but we do not communicate...right now, I'm still alone with our ship just in case she would be back to have another adventurous journey together but of course I'm still gardening other types of plants too as Malay people said "bercinta biar satu, berkawan biar seribu" which means love should only involved one person while friendship, thousands....is my translation correct? If not please tell me. Sharing knowledge is also one of beautiful thing life...
p/s: please forgive my grammar...

blue syndrome?

2008-05-17T16:47:00.001+08:00

have you ever wonder why there are certain people who walks his or her life so painfully yet in front of people they dare to say this life is a wonderful thing and they purely agree. i wonder, not. its the same thing as what you always do in your daily routine, you go to school or work, talk almost about everything to your family or friends and even your partner, you have fun, you eat your favorites food, you give love and happily receive love but once your feet reach your room and the door is lock, you cry not but the tears just keep streaming out. There are no reasons for the tears to be invited. And you start to think why or what makes you cry but you don't get the answer. You don't even understand yourself. I know because it’s been years now yet I still don't have the answer...I am not crazy for sure, just stress. Yet does it powerful enough that even your mind cannot control your body or your body cannot control your mind? I wish there is an answer for that...and maybe some people out there also want to know what went wrong. This life is indeed an exciting place...i'm on my way of enjoying it and of course appreciating it. for me, no matter how hard your life is, no matter how many nights you have filled with silent tears to accompany you to bed, just keep walk on, straight and confidant yet with proud not but smile and carry with you love and faith in your heart while holding someone's hand. Hope you, who read this and understand, will end it with a smile.

list of meaningful songs

2008-05-17T14:49:00.000+08:00

Aaron - U-turn (lili)
Imogen Heap - Speeding Cars
Eric Clapton - Tears in heaven
Lighthouse Family - High
Enigma - Return to Innocence
Alanis Morissette - Uninvited
- Crazy
Jewel - Hand
- Foolish Games
James Morisson - The Pieces Dont Fit Anymore
Christina Aguilera - Hurt
Rob Thomas - Ever the Same

ASIAN
X Japan - The Last Song
- Tears
- Forever Love
Tohoshinki/DBSK - Love in the Ice
- Rainbow
- 'O' Jung.Ban.hap
- Whatever They Say(acapella version)
Utada Hikaru - Flavour of Life
Epik High - One

these songs are just some of my favourite which i can recall.....

my man...

2008-05-17T00:59:00.002+08:00

dilemma...

2008-05-16T23:39:00.001+08:00

that’s what people usually said when they are stuck between 2 things....for me I’m stuck between my mom's hope or my ambition. My mom wants me to be a teacher, English teacher like her and just like my sisters. One of them is already an English teacher and the other one is studying TEASL in UTM and might be an English teacher too. Well, for your information, my late grandfather was a teacher...and today is Teacher's Day.TEACHER TEACHER TEACHER!!!!ohhh god....fuhhh....calm down calm down...well, good thing about being a teacher is you'll get lots of presents during teacher's day. I want to be a tourist guide. Some people might say it’s not worth it when you are actually a university student and will have your Bachelor in 3 more years to come...but I just can’t sit/stand still in a place with the same routine. I want to go outside of the world that I live in for 19 years. I want new experience in new place where language is a barrier. I want to do something adventurous like going to Cambodia,Vietnam,South Korea, or Indonesia for example and help those who need knowledge and help...Malaysia have toooooo many teachers to start with...other countries don’t, I guess...its not that I want to be a teacher in other countries, I just want to give free knowledge about everything to those who have lots of questions and curious about the outside world. Like a volunteer who live, eat, sleep in a village, mix with all the villagers but with a stable job there...Now, i just don’t know...maybe I’ll just wait and see whets going to happen...

My first step.

2008-05-16T20:24:00.000+08:00

friends are good to have and it is the best thing that a person can have but sometimes being alone is better...this is when you can actually express yourself, i mean reeaaaaly express yourself without hurting, or might hurt people around you or even yourself...so this is what i'm going to do...i want to share with someone...its true, even if only one person....as i want to believe that being different is not wrong...what is so different about me...well, then you have to read my blog(n_n)....